On April 23rd, the Conch Republic will officially celebrate its 25th Anniversary as a free nation. Okay, so the Conch Republic — more commonly known as Key West — isn’t really a free nation, though they did make a much publicized attempt at secession in 1982 after border patrol agents set up road blocks to search for drugs and illegal immigrants. Even today, the Republic uses the motto, “We Seceded Where Others Failed.” Every April, the Republic celebrates its independence. This year, they plan to go all out.
If you can get yourselves down to the area in time, you can be part of the festivities. Beginning April 20th and running through the 29th, the City will be sponsoring numerous events, including:
- FRIDAY, APRIL 20th — A Kick-Off Party at the Schooner Wharf Bar, featuring a Conch Shell Blowing Contest.
- SATURDAY, APRIL 21st — The Great Conch Republic Drag Race. Sanctioned by the Conch Republic’s NHRA (Natural Hot Rod Association), the race features Drag Queens. Pits open at 12; Foam wrestling at bubbles over at 5. At 8, The Green Parrot will elect the 2006-2007 Conch Republic Royal Family.
- THURSDAY, APRIL 26th — For the 12th year in a row, the Republic’s only totally impromptu Parade — The “World’s Longest Parade” — will roll down Duval Street from the Atlantic Ocean to the Gulf of Mexico. How can it be impromptu if we all know about it? You’ll see…
- FRIDAY, APRIL 27th — The City will stage a mock battle in which it emerges victorious from enemy forces. The event includes cannon-firings, a raising of the flag, and lots of beer drinking.
- SATURDAY, APRIL 28th — The Fairvilla Megastore Annual Conch Republic Red Ribbon Bed Race will be staged. What?! You’ve never seen beds race down narrow roads? You have not lived, sir. Later that night, you can crash Sloppy Joe’s Post Bed Race Pajama Party…since you’re already dressed for bed!