San Francisco is full of naked people

Naked celebration!Some are rejoicing, and some are fleeing for the hills. This morning, San Francisco passed a city-wide ordinance which de-criminalizes public nudity, a.k.a. it is no longer a “sex crime” to be naked in the grocery store — or anywhere else within city lines, for that matter!

Finally. Decades of nightmares put to rest.

The movement, which began almost fifty years ago on various college campuses, never really received much notoriety, because there just weren’t very many people who were serious about politics and wanted to be naked all the time.

But the right to be naked all the time? That’s worth fighting for.

Many of the supporters chose to remain anonymous, and rumor has it that though a handful of celebrities were involved in the campaign, most of them were unrecognizable due to the lack of airbrushing, and refused to be photographed.

We applaud San Francisco for choosing to be the European beach of the United States. No shirt? No shoes? No oppression!

Our ticket for the annual gay pride parade is already booked. This is gonna be legendary.