The Naked Walk Of Shame And Other Crazy Hotel Antics

hotel door do not disturb
David Nestor, Flickr

Traveling to new places gives us a sense of anonymity we just can’t get when we’re in our home cities – there’s next to no chance of us bumping into someone we know or having people recognize us as “that weird person that did xyz.” Which is perhaps exactly why so many travelers lose their inhibitions when they’re on the road and do things they would never dare otherwise.

What kinds of crazy antics do travelers get up to? Well how about asking hotel room service to deliver a bottle of coca cola to your room and then answering the door in nothing but your birthday suit? Or worse yet, asking hotel staff to hold a camcorder while you and your partner get down and dirty in your suite? It’s hard to believe, but these are exactly the kinds things hotel guests get up to according to a survey by booking website lastminute.com.au.The poll, which focused on Australian hotel guests, revealed many travelers engage in cheeky or otherwise awkward behavior. Requests for “adult” entertainers happen surprisingly often according to hotel staff, while other guests inadvertently put on an adult show after locking themselves out of their room while stark naked (be sure to check out the video below of one such mishap which took place earlier this year). Other less raunchy but no less bizarre behavior include a guest who tried to bring his pet snake with him on vacation and one who drove a golf buggy straight into the hotel.

Weekending: Bodrum/Greece


As an expat in Istanbul, I am very fortunate to have awesome opportunities for short trips around Europe and the Middle East. My previous weekend jaunt was to Beirut, Lebanon. Though the current 90+ degree weather is ruling out a lot of domestic travel for now, for my next getaway, I made like the locals and headed south to the beach.

The place: Bodrum, Turkey

The Bodrum peninsula fancies itself the Turkish Riviera, though the town proper feels a bit more like the Jersey Shore, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. The Bodrum coast (like the Jersey Shore) has great beaches and fun nightlife, though it lacks the sophistication of other European beach towns and the coastline is getting more developed each season. Still, there’s charm left in Bodrum town, beautiful castle and harbor views, and easy boat access to more secluded spots in Turkey and even Greece. Big and boutique resorts with private beaches (many of them jetties) line the sea though you may have to rent a car or rely on taxis and dolmuses (minibuses) to get around. As we wanted to stay in a walkable area with restaurants nearby, we chose the Su Hotel in town, on a quiet street close to the harbor, with a good-sized pool and friendly service.
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  • Water is the big draw to Bodrum, though the town itself has only a few small strips of beach, with most of the beach clubs and resorts in neighboring towns like Bitez and Gümbet. The few town beaches are small but serviceable, as well as convenient and most often free, though you may be obliged to buy a drink from one of the adjoining cafes. If you’re after the wide, sandy beach experience, you’re better off in a resort outside of town or taking day trips.
  • Hop on a boat and be in Greece in an hour. From the ferry, you can walk to a beach where 5 euro will get you two chairs, some bottled water, and an umbrella. Pleasant Kos Town doesn’t have a wealth of tourist attractions, but does remind you how NOT European Turkey is, if only for the good wine, availability of pork, and sensible city planning. Alternatively, boat trips are offered all over town to nearby islands and coves in Turkey.

Downgrades

  • While sometimes it’s pleasant to visit a foreigner-friendly city where English is widely spoken and familiar foods are available, after seeing the third cafe in a row serving a full English breakfast, Bodrum’s popularity with Brits and Australians becomes overwhelming and almost demoralizing. I happened to be in town during the England-Germany World Cup match, and the English loss could be heard up and down the streets. On the plus side, a nice book market on Cumhuriyet Caddesi towards the east end sells English books for as little as 5 TL.
  • You don’t come to Bodrum for sightseeing, but the main attractions can still be a little disappointing. The Castle of St. Peter holds the Museum of Underwater Archaeology (admittedly, I hoped it would actually BE underwater) and while the views from the castle are spectacular and several of the exhibits are interesting, the highlights (the cool-sounding Glass Shipwreck and remains of a Carian princess) are only open Tuesday – Friday. Imagine if New York’s Met Museum closed the Temple of Dendur on weekends or the Louvre limited days to see the Mona Lisa?! Likewise, the Mausoleum might have once been one of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, but not much of it remains.

Getting there

Bodrum is an hour flight from Istanbul, with sporadic direct flights from continental Europe in season. The airport is 60 kilometers from town and a pricey 90 TL taxi ride, but a shuttle bus connects with domestic flights for 17 TL. If you have early or late flights, be sure to factor in the round-trip taxi fare to the cost of your travel. Ferries depart for Kos (also Rhodes) in the morning and return late afternoon for around 55 TL.

Make it a week

Get your bearings in Bodrum town and then sail a gulet yacht for a cruise along the Aegean. Booking a cabin will cost from 400 euro per person including meals (but not alcohol), crew, fuel, and taxes for a week, chartering the whole yacht can run thousands of euro but can work for a group of friends or family. Do your homework and shop around; Turkey Travel Planner is a good primer.

Aussies beware: government won’t help you

“If you’re too dumb or idle to read the travel advisories … then you ought to take responsibility for your own behaviour,” says former Australian foreign affairs minister Alexander Downer.

And, he has a point. If you roll the dice, you have to be ready to lose … even if you get lucky sometimes.

Australian tourists outside their homeland have been getting into trouble lately – be it because of stolen bar mats or travel to war-torn countries. It’s hard not to respect any sense of adventure, but part of growing that testicular fortitude is knowing that you’re on your own. Downer was shocked to learn that he was “responsible” for every Australian abroad … not to mention being responsible for “their own stupidity.”

Downer says that Australians overseas are subject to special laws … and they are not laws from Australia. The lesson from down under applies anywhere. Leave your home turf, and you really should understand the laws of the land you’re about to explore.