Don’t waste your time looking at the coasts, if you have a map in front of you. And skip the big cities and clichés – you won’t find Las Vegas at the top. Austin, Texas is the sexiest city in the country according to a survey by Men’s Health Magazine. A number of factors contributed to the win, including birth rates, condom sales and the rate of STDs … not to mention sex toy sales.
Texas came out looking pretty good, with Dallas, Houston and San Antonio also getting props behind winner Austin. In all, seven of the 15 sexiest cities were in Texas. It must be the heat, because colder cities didn’t fare as well. It isn’t hard to be too sexy for Portland, Maine, which finished last, and Burlington, Vermont.
Some of the likely suspects failed to deliver. Vegas came in at #70, with New York following at #73. San Francisco was #74, with Miami #88.
Last year, we compiled a list of vintage airline commercials, and since the Internet is full of some of the greatest commercials commissioned by airlines, we picked “sexiest airline commercials” as the topic of this top ten lineup.
The list has some vintage clips (Southwest Airlines hotpants) and some pretty recent stuff. So, sit back and enjoy these ten sexiest airline commercials.
Virgin Atlantic 25th anniversary video
This commercial is brilliant – it takes all the best (and the worst) of 1984 to celebrate 25 years of Virgin Atlantic
Air New Zealand “Nothing To Hide”
Bodypainted cabin crew members, and a cameo appearance by the CEO of the airline.
Southwest Airlines
Remember before Southwest Airlines? We didn’t have hostesses in hotpants. And now we still don’t, but at least they don’t charge for checking a bag. Though if I’m honest, I’d probably prefer the hotpants.
Airport metal detector prank
Alright, so it isn’t for an airline, and it isn’t even for a product remotely related to flying, but it has long been one of the most popular commercials involving an airport.
Silverjet
Seriously? Using a lesbian mile high romp to advertise your airline? Sadly, the airline only lasted two years before they realized that their all business class service couldn’t survive in the new economy.
Fake airline, funny commercial
This commercial for “Lynx Airlines” was made in 2008.Obviously it isn’t for a real airline, but it does mimic the services Ryanair said they’d offer in Business Class should they ever start flying transatlantic.
National Airlines “Go Go vacations”
They really don’t make them like this any more – because if they did, someone would probably sue.
If you wanted to sleep with him, you would have married him
Not every sexy airline commercial involves a stewardess in hotpants.
“I just love a man in a JetBlue uniform”
These girls love pilots – but only JetBlue pilots. Talk about being picky.
Nothing says awkward like exposing yourself to your inlaws.
(Warning, may not be suitable for work). This is one of those commercials that was clearly devised before the ad agency had a taker, because nothing in the clip is even remotely aviation related. That doesn’t prevent it from being hilarious.
If you liked the videos, you might be interested in …
“Look, we all have standards,” an adult entertainer familiar with the full- and part-time work of Ryanair flight attendant Edita Schindlerova told The Independent. “I think it’s disgusting that she works for Ryanair. All of us here at Biggus Dickus Productions feel really let down by her. If only she had told us she worked for them, maybe we could have done something to help her. Now, she has lost all our trust. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m off to do a three way.”
If you’ve seen Monty Python’s The Life of Brian, you know not to treat “Biggus Dickus” as a joke name.
While many look down their noses at the porn business, it looks like the airlines are able to give even those in the skin biz someone over which to hold a sense of superiority. Of course, the porn folks could learn a lesson in tolerance from Ryanair, which doesn’t care about Edita’s side job as “Edite Bente.”
If you’re surprised to see the porn industry claim any sort of moral high ground, don’t be. Anyone who has spent a bit of time in this business has had to listen to more than a few hours of First Amendment tirades, claims of wanting to be left alone and so on and so on and so on. Yes, it can get tedious, even though some of it is warranted. Either way, it’s pretty crazy to see the porn industry piss all over the airline business. What happened to “live and let live”?Ryanair flight attendant Schindlerova was recently outed as a part-time porn star by London tabloid The Sun. Her employer doesn’t care, and she hasn’t denied the allegations. She was also featured in the airline’s 2009 calendar, a collection of the sexiest employees that the low-cost carrier has to offer.
Her cover was blown by a pilot who somehow stumbled upon her work. Either this was an incredible coincidence, or this guy, who has not had to see his name in the press, spends a hell of a lot of time cruising the web for porn.
Julia Molony, who covered this story for The Independent, suggests, “Watch out fro the free-orgasm-with-every-flight offer on a billboard near you.” Such naïveté … does she really believe that Ryanair would give “free” anything?
Okay, through some investigative journalism on my part, I’ve been able to find some of her night job work. This is absolutely not safe for work or around children.This is not an adult website, rather it is a Czech tabloid, but do understand that they are able to push the envelope a lot farther than we can in the United States.