DOH! – TSA takes Play-Doh from child at airport checkpoint

by Scott Carmichael on


We live in a very scary world – a world where anything and everything could be a bomb. At least in the eyes of the folks manning the airport security checkpoint.

When young Josh and Nathan Pitney tried to take their Christmas gift of Play-Doh past the checkpoint., an overzealous agent confiscated it. Of course, as is often the case with the TSA, Play-Doh is not on the list of prohibited items, though agents can use “their own discretion”.

Never mind that we taxpayers invested millions on explosive detection equipment, this agent was too damn lazy to test the compound, and decided it would be easier to annoy two young children. Running Play-Doh through the explosives detector would have taken under a minute.

TSA to extend and expand random security measures

by Scott Carmichael on

The “special security directives” put in place by the TSA after the attempted bombing of a Northwest Flight last week expired last night (yes, the same directives that got several bloggers in hot water with the feds).

To keep our skies safe, the TSA extended the directives into Wednesday, and will be issuing new directives later this evening.

What this means to us travelers is that we are in for a new batch of random security measures, and that we’ll once again be left in the dark as to what those measures are (unless someone has the balls to leak them again).

The measures are put in place to allow airlines to implement rules and regulations that may prevent terrorists from trying to assemble or ignite another bomb. The first batch of measures was downright pathetic – some airlines turned off the inflight entertainment system, as a way to prevent terrorists from knowing where the plane was heading. This obviously only works if terrorists have not yet discovered the wonders of the wrist watch. Other parts of the directive allow for the full pat down of all passengers boarding planes bound for the United States.

It will probably take several weeks till everyone settles down, and the TSA tweaks the new rules enough that they find the right balance between real security, and the illusion of security. Until then, get to the airport on time, and be prepared for new security measures to pop up.

The TSA wants to remind you that pies are OK, cranberry sauce is not

by Scott Carmichael on

Despite all the mocking of the TSA, I do need to compliment them on how they try and educate the traveling public on how to deal with their (often silly) rules.

As we approach the busiest travel season of the year, the TSA has taken the time to once again remind people what you need to know about traveling with food or gifts.

The basic rules still apply – liquids are not allowed through the checkpoint unless they are in a “one quart baggie” and under 3 ounces each. Exceptions are made for medication, baby formula and breast milk.

These rules obviously mean that gravy, maple syrup, wine and anything else not on their exceptions list must be placed in a checked bag, or sent ahead in the mail.

The good news is that anything solid is permitted – this includes pies, cakes and that leftover turkey. I’m not entirely sure why jellies and jams are not allowed, but pies are. Bottom line; if you want to carry jam or jelly, put it in a pie.

A special reminder for snow globes – nobody wants to pack those in checked luggage, but the checkpoint will not allow them to pass, so either leave them at home, or send them with FedEx.

As a final reminder, always keep Christmas gifts unwrapped until you arrive at your destination. It sucks to have a TSA agent unwrap all your gifts just to be sure that Zhu Zhu pet isn’t actually a bomb. Once again – shipping gifts is best done by mail, UPS or FedEx. If you ship ahead of time, you’ll be able to send a large box from coast to coast for about $20, which is well worth it, considering how much hassle you’ll prevent.

Why the TSA insists on screening wheelchairs

by Scott Carmichael on

Screening airline passengers in a wheelchair has often been a bit of a hot topic. For some reason, people get wound up when they see the TSA searching every corner of a wheelchair, as if disabled people should automatically be trusted and allowed to pass through without a search of their chair.

The TSA understood this criticism, and decided to do a little research. As it turns out, people in a wheelchair are just as much of a threat as the rest of us, and screeners regularly find items hidden in a wheelchair.

Earlier this year, a passenger in wheelchair was arrested when agents found packages of cocaine. And just a month ago, agents found not one, but two loaded guns under the cushion of a wheelchair in Milwaukee. In this case, the gentleman had simply “forgotten” he still had them there, but this does show how easy it is to hide items like guns in a wheelchair.

So, next time you see the TSA give a disabled passenger in a wheelchair an enhanced search, just remember that anyone can attempt to bring unwelcome items on a plane, disabled or not.

Want to ignore airport security rules? Become a celebrity!

by Scott Carmichael on

Airport security took a bit of blow this week when Britney Spears passed through LAX security carrying… a Big Gulp! I’m not a big fan of paparazzi (or Britney Spears for that matter), but the underlying story is interesting enough to deserve a closer look.

When Britney passed through the checkpoint, she was carrying her Big Gulp, something you and I would be told to throw away. Apparently being a famous singer gets you a special waiver, because none of the TSA staff told her to dump it.

Initially, there was some outrage from TSA opponents, as a drink like that is not permitted. TSA blogger “Bob” was quick to defend the TSA agents by pointing out that there were only ice chips in the cup, and that as long as the cup is put through the x-ray, ice chips are permitted.

As far as the TSA was concerned, that was end of the story. This is where the paparazzi come in handy, because they filmed Britney clearly carrying the cup through the checkpoint, without it ever passing through the x-ray equipment.

So, next time you don’t want to spend $6 on an airport drink, just put on a Britney Spears mask or find yourself a career in entertainment, it’ll make your trips to the airport so much easier.