This is an important security announcement for all of you, who plan on a) visiting Sudan b) engaging in sexual relations with farm animals, or c) both. Stay away from goats in Sudan!

Let this story serve as a lesson to you. A man from Sudan has been forced to take a goat as his wife after he was caught having sex with the animal, BBC reports. The goat’s owner, Mr Alifi, said he surprised the man with his goat and took him to a council of elders and they ordered the man, Mr Tombe, to pay a dowry of 15,000 Sudanese dinars ($50) to Mr Alifi.

The intercourse happened the night before Valentine’s day (awww) and as far …