Do solo adventures break up relationships?

Outside Magazine has an interesting story on their website entitled Never, Ever Let Her Go (On a trip overseas. Alone. Especially to Africa.) The article begins with author Eric Hansen recounting a tale of a married couple who were friends of his, and seemingly had an idyllic marriage. But when the wife went off to Botswana on a volunteer trip for a month, she returned home and announced that the marriage was over, and she now longer was attracted to her husband.

When telling this story to others, Hansen discovered this wasn’t an isolated tale. He uncovered similar stories from a number of people who had their significant others go off on a big, adventurous trip, only to have their relationship end once they came home. Even more confounding was the fact that many of the travelers were women and many of them had been traveling in Africa. The article goes on to get quotes from several guide services and travel companies, who say that this is indeed a common tale that they encounter on a regular basis themselves. A marriage counselor also weighs in on the topic, saying he sees at least one marriage per month break up after an adventurous solo trip.This of course begs the question as to why this occurs. The story speculates that it is due to the person traveling expanding their horizons and having a life altering experience on their journey, something we can all relate to from our own travels I’m sure. The same counselor mentioned above says that generally the issues were there before the solo adventure, but the travels bring them more the forefront.

Outside‘s article concludes with the advice that you don’t let your significant other travel alone. Go with him or her. Experience the life changing moments together, and share the journey. If you break up when you get home, at least you got a great trip out of it, right?

So, has anyone experienced this phenomenon first hand? Have you been the dumper or the dumpee?

The Peranakan Museum – Singapore’s culture unveiled


I was recently given a personal tour of Singapore’s new Peranakan Museum by the curator himself, Randall Ee. I walked in with no idea what “Peranakan” meant, and walked out more than impressed with the culture, the museum, and the fascinating new history of Singapore.

I say “new history,” because Singapore is such a young country — they only became independent from Britain in 1965 — but the story of the Peranakans begins hundreds of years ago. Singapore, sometimes called “the Gateway to Asia,” has been a busy trading post for the entire continent for longer than anyone can remember. Merchants from all over the world would come to Singapore to buy and sell goods.

The markets were controlled by the women in Singapore, and what began to happen was that foreign merchants, both to keep themselves company and to improve their fortunes, would take Singaporean wives (many of them keeping their other families in their home countries and “loving the one you’re with,” so to speak). Some stayed — but during the fall of the Ming Dynasty in 1644, the unrest in China made going home look pretty bleak, and a whole new culture was born.

Peranakan is Malay for “child of,” and was coined to refer to the burgeoning new population of children born to local mothers and foreign fathers. The Chinese are not the only Peranakan fathers; there are several different groups of Indian Peranakans and more, but the Chinese are the largest group by far, and the group focused upon by the Peranakan Museum.
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As in the other Peranakan communities, the Chinese Peranakans would marry their children to other children with the same heritage, so as to continue to pass down Chinese blood and traditions. In this way, the families became and remained true hybrids of their two worlds — for example, Peranakan food is similar to Malay food because the local mothers are the ones who did the cooking (Malaysia is next door), but the serving bowl might be Chinese.

The galleries at the Peranakan Museum include Origins, Religion, Food and Feasting, Public Life, Conversations, Nonyas (the term for girls) and an entire floor of Wedding rituals and artifacts. According to Ee, 95 percent of the items in the museum are locally sourced from private collections and are heirlooms of the wealthier families. “I tell everyone I’m a professional beggar. I go from home to home,” he joked.

I was fortunate enough to catch a special exhibition called Baba Bling (Babas is the term for boys), a breathtaking collection of over 400 pieces of unbelievably opulent jewelry, most borrowed from local homes. Ee says that the women actually helped him build the collection; telling him who had what piece that matched what. “Women never forget what other women have,” he said with a smile. Baba Bling will be running through December 2009.

I found the Peranakan Museum engaging, interesting and extremely informative about Singapore. If it weren’t so specific to the Chinese Peranakans, I’d recommend it over the National Museum of Singapore — but one ought to see that, too, to get a better idea of the whole of the country (be sure and visit the Photography portion of the Living Galleries; it’s not to be missed). Still, The Peranakan Museum taught me about a whole culture I didn’t even know existed. I’d tell anyone heading to Singapore to check it out within your first couple of days — it puts things in an insightful perspective.

This trip was paid for by the Singapore Board of Tourism, but the views expressed within the post are 100% my own.

The best haunted houses and other haunted jaunts

What makes a great haunted house? Gothic architecture? Unexpected things that go bump in the night? Chain saws? Thunder and lightening? Screams, shrieks and wails that pierce through fog? Dripping red goo that looks a lot like blood? Cockroaches on walls and mice that scurry across the floor? A hand that comes out of a box to grab you when you pass? How about a severed head surrounded by garnish served up on a platter?

From California to Pennsylvania and states in between, there are 12 haunted hot spots that have been picked by the staff at Digital City as being the best of the haunted house bounty in the United States. From their descriptions, it seems as if these attractions have most of the above and more–much more.

Interestingly, only one of the picks–the Winchester Mystery House in San Jose is an actual house. The rest range from a movie set to prisons. One, the Haunted School House and Lab in Akron, Ohio, is in a former elementary school.

No matter the venue, each haunted attraction is guaranteed to make you shriek. There’s a reason why.

What seems to be the common denominator among them is the amount of time and professional power it takes to create thrills and chills. For example, 13th Gate in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, the number one pick for two years in a row by Haunted Magazine, is created by a bevy of professional carpenters, technicians and scenery artists–many who have worked in Hollywood. It takes them months to redo this attraction so that each year is different. Before the opening, 100 professional actors know exactly what to do to scare the daylights out of anyone brave enough to make his or her way through the 13 indoor and outdoor sections.

For more worth heading to haunted jaunts, check out Tom’s post on five haunted attractions in the world. The ghost tours of old Orlando, Florida caught my attention in particular. I love real places with real stories behind them.

There are other prisons that offer haunted tours–some of them year round.

One of the ones I have a hankering to go to this year since I missed it last year is the Ohio State Reformatory in Mansfield, Ohio. I’ve only been there during the day and only on the outside. Even that creeped me out. The warden shot himself in the head in his office at this place. Oh, wait a minute. That scene happened in the movie The Shawshank Redemption which was filmed at this prison Still, the place is supposed to be haunted and I’ve heard rave reviews about the reformatory’s haunted tours.

Egypt in a rift with the Louvre over stolen artifacts

The head of Egypt’s Supreme Council of Antiquities, Zahi Hawass, took a bold move yesterday in his on going struggle to get foreign museums to return antiquities taken from that country illegally. Hawass severed all ties with France’s the Louvre over that museum’s refusal to return fragments of 3200-year old painted wall frescoes that were taken from the Tomb of Tetaki in the Valley of the Kings back in the 1980’s.

According to this story, this isn’t the first time Hawass has taken steps to close relations with a museum. He made a similar move with the St. Louis Art Museum over a golden burial mask that that museum has refused to return as well. This is, however, the first time that such a move has been taken against a museum of the incredible stature of the Louvre. Upon alerting officials at the museum of his actions, Hawass also suspended an archeological excavation being conducted under the direction of the Louvre, in Saqqara and canceled a scheduled lecture by former curator Christiane Ziegler, who was in charge of the Egyptology department while employed there.

A response from the Louvre and the French Cultural Ministry was swift in coming. Both said that they were interested in putting this incident behind them by returning the disputed pieces, indicating that Hawass’ decision to play hardball was already paying dividends. When these pieces are returned, they’ll join more than other artifacts that he has recovered since taking office in 2002.
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Get out and go: Events around the world (October 8-11)

It’s time to look at the festivals and events happening around the world, and this week has a particularly international selection of happenings. If you’re close and have time, then you have no excuse to get out and go!

  • Albuquerque – The 38th Annual Albuquerque International Balloon Fiesta kicked off earlier this week and runs through October 11. It is the most photographed event on earth, as more than 700 colorful balloons from all over the world fly high in New Mexico’s sky.
  • Amsterdam – ‘Van Gogh’s letters’ exhibition opens on October 9 at the Van Gogh Museum in Amsterdam. The exhibition Van Gogh’s letters offers a fascinating view of Van Gogh as letter-writer and artist.
  • Melbourne – Melbourne International Arts Festival begins October 9. The festival is a series of cultural events by Australian and International artists and will continue through October 25.
  • Washington D.C. – At the Green Festivals this weekend, enjoy more green business lectures, how-to workshops, green films, yoga classes, organic beer, organic cuisine and live music .

If you make it to one of these events, let us know how it was, or if you know of an even that’s coming up, please let us here at Gadling know and we’ll be sure to include it in the next “Get out and go” round-up.

‘Til next week, have a great weekend!