Five reasons why life on the road can really suck

by Catherine Bodry on

Whenever I tell people my latest travel plans, I usually get the same response: “Oh, you’re so lucky – I wish I could do that.” What they don’t realize is that they can do that — I’ve made travel a priority and set my life up around it. I could have made a nice down payment on a house in my late twenties, but I chose to spend the money on a round-the-world-trip, for example. But despite the perceived glamor (or luckiness) of someone who leads a nomadic life, there are times when never being in one place for long can really suck. Here are five reasons:

1. It can be difficult to make deeper connections with people. When you’re just passing through, you’re just passing through. The older I get, the more I feel this — sure, I make friends easily, but the odds of ever meeting up with people again are slim. It makes me sad.

2. People at home go on with their lives, and you become less and less a part of them. With Facebook, I’m privy to all the fun I’m missing at home. I always reconnect easily with my best friends, but seeing the the photos of celebrations and reading the status updates of those having cozy holidays can intensify the loneliness that my solo travel occasionally leads to.

3. Sometimes it feels like your life is standing still. Everyone else is doing age-appropriate things like having babies and advancing their careers. Suddenly, most of my friends have decent salaries and guest rooms – weird. I’m still sleeping in budget hotels and living out of the same backpack I bought six years ago.
4. You can’t commit to any one thing, and so never experience anything fully. This is kind of related to #1, but it has more to it than just connecting to people. I’m only in Kunming for three months, for example, so I’m not going to buy a bike and get to know the city and its surrounds as well as I could. Equally, I’m not going to learn as much Mandarin as I would if I’d committed to a longer stay. I’ll just get a little sample of everything, and then move on.

5. You continually have experiences that you simply can’t convey to folks who aren’t with you. Just as everyone back home is moving on, you too are living a life no one else can relate to. That’s one reason why Kraig suggested that those who travel without their significant others experience a high rate of breakups. I’m constantly overwhelmed with the scents, sounds, and sights that are impossible to communicate fully. Can anyone really understand what it’s like to see entire hillsides terraced by hand, smell piss and oil and spices all at once, or feel air so humid it feels like you’re wearing it? You just have to be there.

Of course, I have to qualify that for all the reasons life on the road can be hard, there are many more reasons why it’s wonderful. I’m paraphrasing from memory here when I recall Elizabeth Gilbert’s passage in one of her early chapters of Eat, Pray, Love, but it’s one that really spoke to me: “I feel about travel the way a new mother feels about her restless, colicky, newborn baby – I just don’t care what it puts me through. It can barf all over me and I will still love it.”

Hence, I’m still on the road.

To read more about my life in China, click here.

Parents’ worse nightmare: Their child is in trouble overseas

by Jamie Rhein on

For the past couple of days, two stories have been appearing in various forms in the media–one splashier than the other, but both are what parents nightmares are made of. These are the situations they hope they don’t get a phone call about. One is about Amanda Knox, the college student who is in an Italian jail waiting to see if she will spend years there if she’s found guilty for murdering her roommate in a crime that reads like an outlandish tale– perfect for a murder mystery novel. Evidence is not conclusive.

The other story is about Devon Hollahan, an English teacher who vanished from the streets in Frankfurt, Germany at two in the morning when his friend was asking for directions after they attended a Portugal and the Man concert. Hollahan was about twenty feet away from his friend whose back was turned just long enough for Hollahan to disappear unnoticed.

In both cases, the parents of Knox and Hollahan, two people in their early twenties, are part of heartbreaking scenarios and a testimony to the worst that can happen when children grow up past childhood and travel miles past their parents’ admonitions to be careful.

Such news is hard enough when it happens within ones own country. When it happens in a foreign country, parents find themselves in positions dealing with horrific situations in places that may have different procedures than their own country. The legal system in Italy works differently than the one in the U.S., for example.

Knox’s parents and Hollahan’s dad jumped on airplanes in order to offer help. Being on the same side of the Atlantic is a start. It’s a way to be involved, to take action–to have a role in an outcome even if the action does not turn up a positive result.

Hollahan’s dad is not hopeful that his son will be found alive but the dad’s presence in Frankfurt is surely helping the investigation. Hopefully, he will not have to wait long to find out some answers. I can’t imagine what it would be like to take a trip back across the Atlantic without knowing.

In Knox’s case, the verdict will be coming soon. Her family is hopeful they’ll be bringing her home with them. Again, the alternative seems too dreadful.

Both parents’ stories are a reminder that when we travel, it’s important to keep in mind the loved ones we have left at home. Although there are no guarantees when we get up in the morning that our day will go swimmingly well without a mishap, when taking on a particular adventure or experience keep in mind that it’s better to keep ones wits about you and not let your guard down without being aware of your circumstances.

Consider the thought, if this situation goes wrong, what would my parents do? On the other hand, life in one’s own country is risky as well. Life is risky business. In Knox’s case, though, who would have ever dreamed up such a story?

Uncommon traits of a good traveling companion

by Catherine Bodry on

Mike wrote about the top ten traits of a good traveling companion, and yesterday I suggested the types of travel partners you should avoid. But there are some little-known traits of great traveling companions. These might not make or break a trip, but they can make the whole experience much more pleasurable. Here are a few of them:

  • All the bugs bite them instead of you. I’m totally that person, and let me tell you, people loooove sharing a hotel room with me. I wake up swollen, blotchy and itchy, and whoever I’m with wakes up smooth-skinned and well-rested. Life isn’t fair.
  • They’re good with languages. Some of us have skills and some of us don’t. If you don’t, hang with someone who does; you’ll find your travels much easier. Body language counts.
  • They’re hard bargainers, so you don’t have to be. Besides getting you sweet deals, they’ll look like the bad guy as they fight for that one-baht knockoff. Reap the benefits without looking like an a$$hole.
  • They can eat and drink whatever they want. You’ll be certain to have the bathroom when you’ll need it, and you will also be more likely to sample unfamiliar cuisine.
  • They walk your pace. This trait is key — I’m a fast walker and my BFF is slow. We both get frustrated. Go shopping with your potential partner before your trip — if they plow through the mall like a lineman about to make a tackle while you stroll along, sidetracked by any shiny object, have a heart-to-heart about the realities of exploring a city together.

The top five worst traveling companions

by Catherine Bodry on
Your traveling partner can make or break your trip, so you should probably choose carefully when planning a joint trip. Here are five traits of traveling companions you should avoid (and I’ve excluded the obvious, like snorers and kleptomaniacs):

The ditcher: The companion who bails on you at the first whiff of romantic interest, night after night. Besides getting annoyed at being stuck with the romantic-interest’s own travel partner or, worse yet, sitting alone at the bar, you might find that you can’t budget on splitting the cost of hotel rooms when your friend finds a long-term lover.

The puker: I’m not only talking about a weak stomach — there are folks out there who can’t ride a tricycle without tossing their mother’s chocolate-chip cookies. Forget about taking an all-night bus ride as well as sampling local cuisine. And I hope you don’t need the bathroom, because they’ll be in there all night.

The druggie: Ditch the traveler who just wants to get effed up every night (unless you do, too), is in to buying illegal street drugs, and generally makes you nervous crossing international borders in Asia.They’re nothing but trouble, and you could go down with them.

The complainer: I once met a girl when I was traveling from Athens to Rome who wouldn’t shut up about how she just wanted McDonald’s, how dirty Athens was, how much she missed Michigan, etc. I’m normally a very cheery person, so when she suggested we travel together, I changed my itinerary, stat. A little homesickness is normal, but who wants to hang with someone who’s a constant downer?

The money-obsessed: This type can go both ways; either their budget is tighter than a Thai prostitute’s tube top, or looser than said prostitute’s you-know-what (is that metaphor too tacky to write? Apologies). Moderation may be boring, but it’s probably also key to enjoying a longer trip. You could find yourself dining alone while your companion indulges in yet another cup of instant noodles, or dragged along for a trendy, spendy dinner. Make sure your budgets are in agreement before you leave.

Wearing pants in France? You’re breaking the law, ladies.

by Aaron Hotfelder on

Several months ago, French prez Nicholas Sarkozy knocked around the idea of banning the burka. Today The Telegraph points out another item to add to the ever-increasing list of dumb laws: in France it is still against the law for women to wear pants. The law reportedly has been on the books since 1800 and has survived multiple attempts to repeal it, although its application has been narrowed somewhat.

In 1892, an exception was made to the law that allowed women to wear pants “as long as the woman is holding the reins of a horse.” (Sounds like something Borat might propose.) A 1909 modification to the law allowed women on bicycles to wear pants.

Though the law has obviously not been enforced in many years, the French government has little interest in overturning it. A 2003 request to repeal the law was denied by a government official who said, “Disuse is sometimes more efficient than (state) intervention in adapting the law to changing mores.”

More here.