Pay to pee on Ryanair no joke

by Tom Johansmeyer on

Remember when we called Ryanair’s plans to charge for lavatory access a stunt? Yeah, we do, too. Those were simpler days, I guess. It turns out, that stunt concealed an even larger one. CEO Michael O’Leary announced that the airline will begin charging one pound (around $1.65) for access to the special rooms at the front and back of the plane.

I actually see some restraint on the press-whorish CEO’s part. I expected him to break the fee down by bodily function, charging a premium for what results in a bit more time. After all, time is money, and one person’s long stay could cost a few extra bucks because other passengers may not get their turns.

But, the savvy airline leader is hedging his bets … as he did with the fat tax, which is now off the table (O’Leary calls it “impractical”). No start date has been revealed; only a two-year time horizon was given. But, he does say, “We are serious about it.”

There’s only one way to make this better, and O’Leary’s found it. Instead of charging for the existing abundance, he’s planning to tear a few out of each plan, in order to make room for more seats. This works in two ways. First, there are more people on the plane who become potential piss-payers. Also, there are fewer lavs, creating a scarcity of resources.

Southwest Airlines new fees: Pets, children and baggage

by Jamie Rhein on

Starting in June, Southwest Airlines is allowing for pets on board for a $75.00 pet fare. This doesn’t mean the animal that won’t fit in a small carrier can climb on board. The carrier will count as a carry on bag. Hmmm, what if the pet fits in a purse and no one knows it’s there?

In the human realm, there’s another fee being tacked on in June for children flying solo if they are between the ages of 5-11. The $25 is to help cover the cost for making sure that junior, as an unaccompanied minor gets the extra assistance needed. Flights need to be direct, otherwise no solo travel for your pre-adolescent offspring.

In another effort to bring in more money, another $25 is being tacked onto the overweight baggage fee. On a positive note about this overweight baggage stuff, I imagine travelers aren’t hurting their backs as much dragging belongs from pillar to post.

If you compare the fees other airlines charges for these services, as reported in this AP article, Southwest is still a cheaper option. The $75 charge or a pet seems like a bargain, although AirTran’s fee is just $69 for one-way.The most expensive is Delta. The on-board pet can cost $150 to $277.

Delta backtracks on extra bag fees

by Tom Johansmeyer on

Delta is caving to competitive pressures, cutting its plans for extra bag fees on international flights. The airline says that others have not matched its fee of $50 for the second bag checked on international flights. Now, it will only apply to travel between the United States and Europe. The fee is effective July 1, 2009.

Originally, this new fee was supposed to bring the battered airline (aren’t they all?) – which also happens to be the world’s largest – another $100 million in revenue. That’s a lot of cash, but it’s probably realistic. After all, fees for extra bags brought Delta an additional $177 million in 2008, and it was good for an extra $1 billion for the airline industry as a whole.

First and business class passenger are exempt, given the exorbitant sums they’re laying out already. Also, active military passengers will not have to pay for a second bag – which is as it should be.

Misery works: airlines making money on baggage fees

by Tom Johansmeyer on

The one thing nobody says about the “nickel and dime” strategy is that it can work. For the airline industry, charging passengers for extra bags translated to more than $1 billion in lifeblood to a struggling business last year, according to the Department of Transportation. As much as you may hate to shell out that extra cash, last year, it went to businesses that desperately needed it.

Before the financial decay spread to every corner of the business community last year, airlines typically allowed two pieces of checked luggage per person and charged for anything else that followed. Then, United Airlines started demanding that passengers throw down $25 for a second bag, with US Airways following to the tune of $15.

It adds. Up. United brought in an extra $133 million. Delta picked up an extra $177 million. American Airlines wins with $278 million last year from baggage fees. Even Southwest Airlines pulled in an extra $25 million. Rick Seaney, CEO of Farecompare.com, believes that baggage fees could be worth up to $3.5 billion in 2009.

March a good month for on-time arrivals

by Tom Johansmeyer on

We all love to hate the airlines, and on-time arrivals are among our largest gripes. There’s nothing worse (well, within reason) than seeing the toe-tapping that comes with the disgruntled looks of people waiting to pick you up … it’s not like they had to spend endless hours on the runway or circling LaGuardia. Well, in March, they weren’t as bad.

The 19 largest airlines in the country reported an improved rate of on-time flights compared to March 2008, according to some data from the Feds. Well, the bar wasn’t set very high. On-time results for March 2008 were 71.6 percent, according to the Department of Transportation‘s Bureau of Transportation Statistics and reached 78.4 percent this year. Before you get too excited, it’s down from 82.6 percent in February.

So, what does all this mean? Airlines were late almost a quarter of the time, and that includes the padding applied to routes. Aviation analyst Michael Boyd says that a flight from Binghamton, NY to New York City is scheduled for an hour and 15 minutes – not the 45 minutes it takes.

Aviation system delays were responsible for 7.3 percent of delays, with late arrivals from other planes kicking in another 6.5 percent. Factors within airlines’ control were responsible for almost 5 percent delays.

Extreme weather? A mere 0.62 percent.