Airport security checks your luggage, carry-on and… penis size?

by Scott Carmichael on

Airport security never ceases to amaze me, every time I think things are getting a little wacky, I’m shown something new that makes everything I saw in the past suddenly seem logical.

Urinals at the Southwest airlines terminal at Houston’s Hobby airport have a sign warning peeing passengers that:

“Automatic infrared flush sensors also provide video monitoring for security purposes”

Seriously, the department of homeland security now considers male genitalia to be a threat to national security?

Now, before I blame the department for being total idiots, I can’t help feel that this entire thing is a prank, and that everyone reporting on it is part of one funny joke.

In fact, despite their track record of silly decisions, I doubt they’d do this. Obviously, someone decided to have some fun, and made some homemade stickers. If I am proven wrong, I’d be really interested to hear why the TSA is so interested in these images, and how long until we are all warned about the dangers of penis bombs.

Click read more to see a larger version of the photo.

Airport puffer program scrapped – millions wasted

by Scott Carmichael on

It is no secret that the government can be a huge source of wasteful spending, but seldom is money wasted as swiftly as when it comes to purchases for our “national security”.

In 2004, the Department of Homeland Security purchased 207 “puffer machines” to deploy around the various airports.

These machines cost $160,000 each, and despite this insane price, they would break down quite regularly. Simple things like dirt and humidity could render the machines unusable, raising the yearly operating costs to just under $50,000 (per machine!).

Total loss: $33 Million.

Worst of all, only 94 of these expensive contraptions were actually put into service protecting us – the rest are still in a warehouse awaiting airport deployment, something that will never happen.

I hope they’ll be able to get a good price for them on Ebay, though I doubt they’ll ever fetch anything close to the $17 Million the taxpayer spent on them, even if they are new in box.

Scrapping the program won’t bother the TSA too much, they are about to spend close to $50 Million on those nifty new full body image scanners.

Visting the US? Remember to register with ESTA before you leave!

by Scott Carmichael on

If you live in one of the countries participating in the US Visa Waiver program, pay attention, as things just got a little more complicated for you.

As of January 12th 2009, all visitors to the US who are eligible for the visa waiver program will have to apply for travel authorization at least 72 hours prior to their trip.

There are 35 countries that participate in the Visa Waiver Program (VWP), and if you have ever come to the US on the VWP, you’ll have probably filled in one of those annoying green forms on your flight here.

Those days are now officially over, and the US Government wants to know who is coming here, before they get on the plane.

Statistics from the Department of Homeland Security claim that 99.6% of all people who apply for travel permission get it granted within seconds, which still leaves a fairly decent amount of people who do not get it, for any number of reasons.

The new authorization system is called ESTA – Electronic System for Travel Authorization. The site is available in 16 different languages. To apply for permission to fly to the US, you enter all your personal information, passport data, and flight numbers. You then get to answer the same questions you probably remember from the VWP form, which are there to determine whether you are a Nazi, drug dealer or other nasty kind of person.
If all works out, and you are not on a terrorist watch list, you’ll receive an authorization number. If the system declines your request, you’ll be required to apply for a regular visa through your local US Consulate or Embassy, which will most certainly take some time, so be sure you don’t wait too long!

Of course, as with all new systems like this, there are going to be some glitches, but the most worrying statistic is that far too many people had not heard of the new rules, and arrive at the airport unprepared. Thankfully, the US government has allowed for a short grace period.

The hardest hit are going to be people without Internet access as there is no offline application process. There will be no terminals at the airport, and people in a VWP country who arrive at the airport without an ESTA authorization number may be denied boarding.

Once you register for ESTA, the authorization is valid for 2 years, or the life of your passport (whichever is shorter). As with all international travel, you will need at least 6 months duration left on your passport if you want authorization.

The official ESTA site can be found here, just make sure you don’t fall for the tricks of paid services like Esta.us, who’ll do “all the hard work” for you, for a mere $249!

Green card holder? Be prepared for fingerprinting at the airport!

by Scott Carmichael on

As part of the US-VISIT program, designed to protect the country from terrorism and other threats, US Permanent Residents will soon have to subject to fingerprinting when they enter the country through an immigration checkpoint. The new rules go into effect on January 18th 2009.

The scheme is already in place for non permanent residents and other visitors, but it is the first time it has been expanded to permanent residents.

Fingerprinting Green card holders is quite strange, because part of the process of becoming a permanent resident involves an FBI background check and a pretty intensive fingerprinting procedure.

Of course, the fingerprinting could also be a way of ensuring the person entering the country with a Green card actually is who they say they are. It could also simply mean that the records stored within the government systems are such a mess, that they can’t do any reliable matching against terrorist records.

The next step in US-VISIT could be a little more scary, as the Department of Homeland Security claims there are “not currently” any plans to start fingerprinting US citizens when they re-enter the country, but I suspect that is probably not very far away.

(Via: Cnet)

Update: Dept. of Homeland Security weighs forcing passengers to wear stun gun bracelets on airplanes

by Jeffrey White on

Back in March, Gadling blogged about a firearm training system, Lamperd, which had patented a bracelet that worked like a stun gun when activated.

At the time, Lamperd was lobbying the Transportation Security Administration to make it mandatory for all airline passengers to wear one, with the thinking that it was the best way to thwart a terrorist.

Well, here’s an update.

The Department of Homeland Security, ever the shepherds watching over their flocks, appears to be seriously weighing making this bracelet mandatory and has sent a letter to Lamperd encouraging the company to draft a formal proposal for integrating its bracelet into flight security.

That’s right. Your tax dollars are funding the R&D arm of DHS, which wants to develop technology that acts essentially as a GPS attached to your wrist, allowing the government to track pretty much everywhere you go once you check in for your flight, and giving the flight crew the ability to waylay you if you get out of hand.

O.K., that might be overstating it: Officials say the bracelet would only be activated in the event of a terrorist attack. But still….

Here is a promotional video for the bracelet that piqued DHS’s interest.

The Washington Times today quotes a letter from DHS’s Paul S. Ruwaldt, of the Science and Technology Directorate, in which he writes to Lamperd saying, “To make it clear, we are interested in…the immobilizing security bracelet and look forward to receiving a written proposal.”

The Times says the letter was written on Federal Aviation Administration letterhead.

The Times goes on to detail what the bracelet could do. It would:

  • Eliminate the need to carry a boarding pass
  • Contain personal data about you, including your travel history
  • Monitor the whereabouts of both you and your luggage after check-in
  • Employ Electro-Musclar Disruption technology that could immobilize a passenger for nearly 10 minutes

Now, with all the idiotic things passengers have been doing on planes of late, I could maybe get behind employing some kind of bracelet stun gun.

But seriously, I consider all this with some foreboding. I mean, slipping a bracelet on a little kid that could deliver a shock powerful enough to make an electronic dog fence zap seem like a pinprick is a scary thought. What if a flight attendant accidently activates one of them?

What do you think? Would mandatory bracelets like these make air travel safer, or is this just another way for the government to look over our shoulders?

What other strange things have been found on planes?


Click the image to read the bizarre story…