Galley Gossip: Bids are out! (my schedule, a little airline lingo, and a flight attendant poll)

by Heather Poole on

“Bids are out!”

Those three words are exclaimed each and every month by flight attendants (and pilots) around the world. Perhaps you’ve even witnessed a crew of four (or more) call out the three words above as they briskly walk through the terminal and pass another crew of four (or more) on their way to the gate.

Maybe you’ve wondered, what does that mean, as you stood waiting for your delayed flight to board. And while you continued to stand there impatiently waiting, you watched as four (or more) cell phones were simultaneously flipped open and placed to the ear. Rest assured that call must be made upon hearing those three words. If it can’t happen right then and there, it will happen very shortly, even if the flight attendant has to hide in the lavatory during the boarding process to make it happen. Why? BECAUSE THE BIDS ARE OUT!

BID, BIDS, BIDDING, BID SHEET – a request of choice routes made by each flight attendant to fly specific monthly schedules. At the airline I work for, our bid sheet offers over hundreds of lines to choose from. Bids are awarded by company seniority, which is why those flights to Asia and Europe always have the most senior flight attendants working the trip.

LINE, LINE HOLDER – a sequence of trips a flight attendant is offered each month. A line holder is not on reserve and works each of those trips in consecutive order.

RESERVE – Reserve flight attendants do not have a line. They bid for days off only. When they don’t have a day off, they remain on-call, meaning the company can (and will) assign the flight attendant a trip at any time of day (or night), with at least two hours time to get to the airport. Reserve duty is much like an on-call doctor. We must stay within a manageable radius of our base (mine covers three airports JFK, LGA and EWR). The flight attendant must be duty ready whenever on reserve. This means you must be ready to board a flight within one hour of its departure, which means there are no late nights out and absolutely no alcohol, since you can (and will) be called out to work any time of day or night. I remember one night having a quiet evening at home with a movie and Chinese take out. The food had not even arrived to my apartment and I was already leaving for a trip to London! There’s no warning, no lead time, and no excuses.

JUNIOR, SENIOR, SENIORITY – Refers to a flight attendants years of experience. Years of experience with an airline is based on date of hire. Seniority is everything at an airline, which is why the merging of most airlines does not happen smoothly. Junior flight attendants have to serve on reserve. In order to avoid having to do reserve duty , I commute from my home in Los Angeles (one of our most senior bases in the system) to New York (our most junior base). For me it is better to commute and be a big fish in a little pond than to work from home and have the uncertainty of my schedule loom over our family.

BASE – City in which a crew member originates and ends a trip. All trips start and end from ones base.

COMMUTE, COMMUTER, COMMUTING – the process of getting to your base city. I commute to work from Los Angeles to New York before each trip. Most airline employees who commute to work spend the night in a crash-pad. Like many flight attendants, my crash-pad is located very close to two of the three airports in my base city.

TURN, TURNS, TURNAROUND – any trip that originates from and returns to the same city on the same day. It is not uncommon for a flight attendant to see several cities over the course of 48hrs, only to arrive back to the city they left from. I have flown from LGA to ORD to DFW back to ORD and arrived back in LGA only to come home, shower, sleep and do it all over again the very next day.

Last week, after spending a good four days in a row staring cross-eyed at the bid sheet, I found out that for the month of November I was awarded line 50. Chicago turns. My particular trip will depart to Chicago a little after noon and return to New York just before midnight on the same day. Turns, are not my trip of choice, but we’ll get to that later.

Flight attendants bid once a month, near the end of the month, for a schedule the following month. I know, it’s confusing, but stick with me. Each line shows exactly what days and which trips a flight attendant will be working for the month. So whenever you see a couple of crew members sitting in the terminal, or on the jump-seat, with their noses glued to a packet of papers for hours on end, nine times out of ten they’re studying the bid sheet. This is not the time for chit chat, so unless you have a serious concern to discuss, or food to share, do not disturb the flight attendant. Bidding, for a flight attendant, is very serious business.

TRANSCONS – a transcontinental, across country, or coast to coast flight.

TRADING, DROPPING, PICKING UP – the act of swapping, giving away, or taking another flight attendant’s trip.

BACK UP, BACKING UP: working several trips in a row in order to have several days off in a row.

WIDEBODY – any aircraft with two aisles. The bigger the airplane, the more senior the crew.

NARROWBODY – any aircraft with a single aisle.

When I bid, I choose to work the transcons because they are easy to drop. I’m a commuter, and because I don’t want to waste my precious days off flying back and forth across the country, I back my trips up. That means at some point during the month I’ll fly to New York as a stand by passenger, spend the night in my crash-pad, work back and forth across the country as many times as possible in seven days, and then fly home to Los Angeles, which is where I’ll stay because I’m done for the month. Yeah, I know, it’s a good life – until all the flights to base are oversold, canceled, delayed and I’m unable to make it to work.

But remember, unlike most of my colleagues, I’m a low time flier, which pretty much means I work part time. In order to do this, I have to hold something desirable, not necessarily what I want to work, but what others prefer to work. Transcons on the widebody are the most sought after trips. Since I’m now a domestic flight attendant, I bid the flights to Los Angeles from New York. They’re easy, worth a lot of money, rarely ever cancel, and if I do decide to work one, I can layover at home with my family, not the layover hotel.

The reason I bid Chicago turns, and not transcons, for the month of November is because that line was the first line I could hold with Thanksgiving off. Yes, believe it or not, this will be the first Thanksgiving I’ve held off in thirteen years of flying. I’m way too junior to hold a holiday off on a line of transcons. In fact, I can barely hold transcons on non-holiday months, and if I do, I’ll most likely be working in business class, the most junior position on the aircraft, which is not a position you want to work if you’re trying to drop the trip.

TRIP TRADE, TRIP TRADER – the act of trading trips with another flight attendant. As this can prove to be a daunting task, flight attendants hire a person who manages, (for a fee), several different flight attendant schedules at once.

The first thing I do when bids are finalized is call my trip trader. She is one of the most important people in my life. Without her I don’t know what I would do. She makes my life work. Actually, what she does is make it possible for me to work, because it’s not easy when you have a two-year old child at home and you are married to a man who travels over 100,000 miles a year, and you don’t have family around to help when you’re out of town.

Now I have no idea how my trip trader does what she does, but the girl works magic, and I love her for that! In fact, I just checked my schedule and most of my Chicago turns have already disappeared. YES! And I’ve got two fantastic San Francisco transcons backed up in the middle of the month on my schedule! WOO-HOO! I love my trip trader, and life is good.

So good, in fact, I’m about to purchase three airline tickets to fly home to Dallas for the Thanksgiving holidays. Remember, this is the first Thanksgiving I’ll be celebrating at a home, and not in a dumpy airport hotel. Yes, I can fly for free as a stand by passenger, but like I said, I actually want to make it home for the holidays. What I don’t want to do is spend the holiday weekend getting bumped from flight to flight traveling with the family on the busiest holiday of the year. Oh no, I want to eat delicious turkey and dressing at my mother’s house, not a turkey sandwich and fries at Chili’s in the Los Angeles Airport.

Are you a flight attendant? If so, take the following poll. If not, check out this cool website and test your knowledge of even more airline lingo.

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Photos courtesy of: (flight attendant legs) Laszlo-photo , (airplane interior) Carrib, (turkey) Xbermathew

Galley Gossip: A question about losing booked seats on the airplane

by Heather Poole on

Dear Heather,

I have a question. We have a flight booked to Orlando with an airline that has seat assignments. Twice they have changed our seats so that we are not sitting together. The first time we were able to have it corrected. But this time, I guess the flight is completely booked and so far they have not been able to find us two seats together. My concern is that my mother is a senior and afraid to fly. Is there anything I can do? And why do the airlines do this? We booked months in advance and used this airline to make sure we would be sitting together. We flew to Orlando last year and did not have this problem. Does this happen often? Just wondering and looking for advice.

Thank you.

Sue

Dear Sue,

I’m sorry to hear of your troubles with the airline. What happened to you is not right and unfair. Now I could tell you why I believe this keeps happening, but the truth is I don’t know for sure, so I emailed your question to my friend who is an agent for the same airline I work for at the Los Angeles International Airport.

Before I share what my friend, the agent, had to say, I just want you to know that I understand what you’re going through, having to worry about whether or not you’ll be able to sit next to your elderly mother, as I have a two year-old I travel with regularly. When traveling on my flight benefits, the odds of getting two seats together are slim to none. There’s nothing worse than having to beg and bribe people to switch seats. Talk about stress.

Sure, you can ask the flight attendant to help you, but due to the fact that the flights are staffed with minimum crew, and the crew is busy checking emergency equipment, setting up the galleys, greeting passengers at the door, and dealing with all that carry-on luggage that will not fit into the overhead bin, the flight attendants will not be able to assist until the boarding process is over. Boarding, by far, is the busiest time for a flight attendant, which is why you probably won’t see one until seconds before the aircraft door is shut, which just adds to your stress. You don’t need more stress. You’ve been through enough already.

Now here’s what my friend, the agent, had to say about your lost seats, and what you can do about it in the future…

Yes, it happens more often than not, unfortunately. Some of the time it is an equipment change, meaning the original aircraft scheduled is switched out for one of many reasons (a completely different panel of Q & A’s). When this happens all of the reserved seats are dropped and need to be re-assigned. If there is a schedule change (sometimes people are unaware of it because it may only be by a few minutes), this will cause seat assignments to drop, too. This is probably one of the most frustrating situations for not only passengers, but for agents as well,because most of the time the solution cannot be reached until you are standing at the gate prior to boarding the flight.

My suggestion: call the airlines and inform them that your mother needs wheelchair assistance (Even if she doesn’t, because she is elderly). At the time of the call, ask again if there are seats together because of the fact she will need assistance. If they are unable to switch them over the phone, don’t just take the closest seats together (especially if one is a middle seat). Instead opt to take a window and an aisle. Once you get to the airport and remind them you need a wheelchair, ask again if they can change seats. Most likely they will advise you to ‘check at the gate’. Please be patient. Although I realize this is frustrating, it’s not over yet.

Once you get to the gate, go to the gate agent. The gate agent has the ability to unblock seats and if willing to help, could page some people to switch a window next to your mom for the window you are holding, for example. If all else fails, once you get onboard the aircraft (and by the way, if your mom takes the wheelchair ride, you’ll be boarded first), ask the people seated near you or near your mom to swap seats.

As an agent, I see this day in and day out, and I sympathize with your aggravation. My grandparents had a similar situation last year when traveling for the holidays. I gave them the same advice after they were getting upset when they weren’t getting anywhere over the phone. I urged them to be patient and polite (agents do not respond well to screamers) and ask at the points I suggested. Sure enough, hours later, they arrived safely and at the last minute – they were about to give up – were able to swap seats and sit together on the flight after all.

I hope that helps, Sue. Thanks for writing and good luck!

Heather

Photos courtesy of Joshuacw (top of page) and Viviandnguyen (above)

Galley Gossip: Flight attendant pet peeve #5 – You’re still here?

by Heather Poole on

I’m wearing the blue polyester dress, you know the one, and I’m standing two rows behind you, an arm draped over a seat, a hand gripping the plastic handle of my Travelpro bag. When the lights are turned to bright, I turn around and look at my coworker, and without uttering a word, our eyes say everything that can possibly be said.

Finally you step into the aisle, look at me, and then smile, so I smile at you, and while I’m smiling I watch you dig around inside three different seat back pockets.

“Thanks for a nice flight,” says a voice over the PA, and just like that the voice is gone, along with the rest of the passengers, and crew. It’s just me, my coworker, and you.

When it comes to the deplaning process, there are three types of passengers…

THE ME FIRST PASSENGER: Jumps out of the seat before the seat belt sign has been turned off. If there are other me first passengers standing in the aisle, they will push each other out of the way in order to be the first me first passenger off of the airplane. Don’t you know the first one on should always be the first one off, even when he’s sitting in business, not first.

THE NORMAL PASSENGER: Waits patiently in the seat until the passengers sitting a few rows ahead stand. At this point the normal passenger gathers their belongings, and when the time comes, steps into the aisle, grabs the suitcase out of the bin, and begins to walk to the front of the airplane, not once breaking the rhythmic deplaning flow. Thankfully most passengers are normal passengers – when it comes to getting off the airplane.

THE I’VE GOT ALL DAY (AND NIGHT) PASSENGER – I do hope this is not you. Granted, you are very nice, and quite polite, a dream passenger really, and I did have a wonderful time talking to you in the galley, but the time has come to say goodbye, so buh-bye. Adios time. Look, it’s not forever, we can do this again, but at another time, on a different flight. So go, please, now! No offense, don’t mean to be rude, but the layover is short!

Again I turn around and look at my fellow coworker who is looking at her watch. “Nine hours and twenty minutes,” she mumbles, shaking her head.

Remember, this nine hour and twenty minute layover includes the hour I will get ready for work in the morning, as well as the twenty minutes I need to take the hotel van back to the airport and make my way through security. Which means the layover is more like eight hours. Don’t forget that eight hours includes the ten minute van ride to the hotel tonight, as well as the amount of time it will take the van to get to the airport in order to take us to the hotel, not to mention the time it takes to check-in once we’re at the hotel, after we get in line behind you. Which means that eight hour layover is starting to look more like seven. If you leave now.

While I continue to stand there, waiting, still waiting, I’m wondering why you are just now reaching for your luggage in the overhead bin, and why little Johnny does not have his shoes on, and why your wife or husband or whoever it is you are traveling with is now on all fours looking under the seat, not your group of seats, but three rows ahead, and why oh why are you now standing on the armrest to get a better look into that empty overhead bin?

“I think we’ve got it all,” you say, but before I can breath a sigh of relief, you place your suitcase on the ground and unzip your rollaboard. “You don’t have to wait on us, because we’ll probably be a few more minutes here.”

I’d leave if I could, but I can’t, so I don’t, which is why I’m still standing there, one arm still draped over the seat, a hand still gripping, gripping, gripping the plastic handle of my Travelpro, as a swarm of cabin cleaners make their way to the back of the airplane. That’s when I think I hear, “Mind if I use the bathroom?”

“Oh…umm…sure.” I struggle to move my wheelie bag sideways so you can get by, and as you pass me by, I find myself wondering why? Why here? There’s a much cleaner bathroom in the terminal. Why now? The flight was five and a half hours long. Why me? Don’t answer that!

Okay, here’s what I don’t get. You came to the airport at least an hour before departure, waited in line at security, and then found a place to pick up a few snacks where you had to wait in line to pay, before heading over to the gate area to wait your turn to board. Once on the aircraft, you waited to takeoff, and after we finally took off, a few minutes late, you found yourself waiting for a drink. After enjoying your adult beverage of choice, you spent a very long time waiting to land, and while you waited five hours for this bird to touch ground, you may have found yourself waiting in line to use the lavatory. Eventually we land and you wait your turn to deplane, very patiently, a little too patiently. You’ve finally gotten your things in order, and little Johnny is wearing his shoes, and your wife or husband or whoever it is you are traveling with is no longer crawling around on the floor, so what, exactly, are you waiting for now?

You sling a heavy bag over your shoulder. “I think we’re ready.”

I smile, and this smile is for real, and together we walk to the front of the aircraft. At least I think we’re walking to the front of the aircraft, because you stop, turn around, and look at me. “Mind if I double check one more time to make sure I have everything?”

“Oh…umm…sure, go ahead,” I say, struggling once more to move my wheelie bag sideways, and as you pass me by, I find myself wondering why?

CHECK OUT THE OTHER PET PEEVES…

Galley Gossip: A question about traveling with car seats and strollers

by Heather Poole on

Dear Heather,

Okay, so how bad is to have a one-year old on a plane without an actual ‘seat’? Please tell me it’s not the worst thing in the world????I wanted to bring a car seat on board, but they won’t let us because we’re not buying her a ticket. Also, should we check the stroller on the plane? We have a bugaboo, and I hate for it to get ruined, but it breaks down very easily. We could get a bag for it? Do you know if they make specific bags for strollers? Any advice please????????????

Thanks,
Marlo

Dear Marlo,

It’s not the worst thing in the world to have a one-year old on the airplane without an actual seat! Now take a deep breath and relax, Marlo, because you are a good mother, whether you buy that seat or not, and you’re going to need all that nervous energy in flight entertaining your daughter. Trust me, I know. Whenever I travel with my little one, regardless of how well behaved he is, I always end up feeling completely drained by the end of the trip.

As a flight attendant, it is my duty to tell you that it is safer for your daughter to travel strapped into a car seat that has been secured to an airplane seat. But let’s get real for a minute, because that, I know, is not always possible for some to do, particularly in this day and age when people are just struggling to survive. With that said, I must tell you that I have traveled with my son, along with my guilt, minus the car seat, on the airplane one or two times. My advice to you is to keep your seat belt fastened during the flight while you hold your daughter in your lap, because turbulence happens, even when the seat belt sign is not on.

You stated that you want to bring your car seat on-board, but the airline won’t let you because you are not buying the extra seat. I do not know which airline you are traveling on, but if you were traveling on the carrier I work for, I’d tell you to take the car seat with you anyway, just in case there is an open seat available. If there’s not an extra seat, the airline, at least my airline, would then gate check your car seat. Key word is gate check. Gate check means you are checking the item at the gate. Once at your destination, the car seat (or stroller) will meet you at the aircraft door, not at baggage claim.

If you do bring a car seat on-board the aircraft, please please please make sure it is approved by the FAA and do read the installation instructions before it is time to install the thing. I can not tell you how many times people come aboard and do not know how their car seat operates and get angry at me when I can not tell them how THEIR car seat works. There are hundreds of different makes and models produced each and every year, so unless you come across a flight attendant who has a child that uses the exact same model as you, chances are that flight attendant is not going to be able to help.

When traveling with a lap child, try to get an aisle seat. With so little leg room, it is impossible to get anything out of the diaper bag when the seat in front of you is reclined and there’s a baby sitting on your lap. If you are in an aisle seat, you’ll be able to swing the diaper bag into the aisle in order to grab whatever you need out of the bag – bottles, diapers, toys, etc. Just make sure to check and see that the drink cart is not rolling in your direction beforehand. And if there is a drink cart parked at your row, ask the flight attendants if they can spare a few plastic cups, “stacking cups”, in order to keep baby busy for a good five minutes. Hey, every minute counts when you’re on the airplane with a child.

As for the stroller, I also own a Bugaboo (as well as a BOB for jogging and a Maclaren that I keep in New York) and I can not say that the Bugaboo breaks down easily, not when you’re in a hurry and you’ve got your hands full, nor can I imagine lugging that thing with me anywhere, except to the mall, and perhaps to the beach for a nice leisurely walk. Keep in mind that if you do decide to check the Bugaboo, most likely you will have to pay a checked bag fee, and add that fee to the price you’re going to pay for the Bugaboo transport bag, and you’ll be paying close to $200. While I do love my Bugaboo, I don’t love it THAT much. And I would not want to be the passenger standing behind the Bugaboo family at security. When it comes to travel, think light, think easy, and think disposable. Whenever I travel with my son, I use a cheap umbrella stroller I bought at Target. What I like about the stroller, besides the fact that it was cheap, is that I can attach it to my rollaboard, if the kid feels like walking, or hang it in the closet, so that I don’t have to check it, and if I do have to check it and it does get ruined, big deal, I’m out $25.

Hope that helps!

Happy travels,

Heather

Galley Gossip: Middle Seat Etiquette

by Heather Poole on

Flying back from Honolulu, I found myself crammed in a middle seat. Now I’m not a big person, just a normal sized person, and yet there I sat with my elbows held tight against my side, my hands resting in my lap, as the broken seat in front of me reclined much farther back than it should have. Oh yeah, I had a woman’s head an inch from my chest. Good thing I didn’t need anything out of my tote-bag, the one located under the seat in front of me, the one I could not reach if I so inclined. And then, if that wasn’t bad enough, things got worse, much worse.

The man sitting beside me, the one wearing the trendy dark blue designer jeans traveling with the family sitting across the aisle from him, claimed the armrest between us.

So what, you say? Wait…there’s more.

The elbow, the one attached to a very tan and muscular arm, crept over the armrest and kept on going until it found itself in my space – MY SPACE! Thank god my son, and not another adult, sat on the other side of me, so I could lean way over into the space my son did not yet prize. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and tried not to scream as I felt the faint tickle of manly arm hairs against my skin.

Middle seat etiquette, am I the only one who cares?

I’ll never forget when Cady, my best friend and old roommate, got called out to work a flight from New York to Los Angeles. This was thirteen years ago and we were on reserve and the thought of working a 767 transcon scared the heck out of us. We were new, brand spankin new, and that airplane was big, 160 passengers big! Keep in mind there were also nine flight attendants who knew exactly what they were doing, unlike the two of us, working on that gigantic bird! What made the trip even worse was that Cady had been called out to work the lead position on the 767. Cady, fresh from the charm farm, would be in charge for the next two days.

“How did it go?” I asked, practically leaping off the couch when she walked through the door after her trip the following evening.

Parking her black bag against the wall, she flopped down in front of the television on the lumpy sofa beside me. “I actually had to settle an argument between two grown men.”

I laughed. “Over what?”

“An armrest. And they actually asked to speak to the one in charge. Me!”

“What did you say?” I asked, and it was at this point I wondered if I should fetch a pen and paper to write down what she had said, just in case I found myself in the same predicament on a future flight. Hey, a flight attendant does not want to experience any unplanned emergencies.

“I just told them they had to share. One guy could use the armrest for the first half of flight and the other guy could use it the last half of the flight. What else could I say?”

Cady had a point. There was not much else to say. Share the armrest, I made a mental note.

While I have witnessed many ridiculous things aboard the airplane, I have not had the pleasure of seeing two grown men duke it out over an armrest. Fighting over a seat being reclined, yes. An overhead bin, every single flight. A first class seat upgrade, oh yeah. But an armrest, never. I’m so grateful for that.

Flash forward thirteen years and I would have loved for someone like Cady to have stomped down the aisle in a pair of black scuffed up Dansko clogs and ordered that beefy guy sitting beside me to share. Not that I would have even used the armrest if Fancy Pants had actually moved his elbow a good five inches to the left, but it would have been nice to have had at least a few arm hair free minutes flying from Honolulu to Los Angeles.

Middle seat etiquette, that’s what I spent the entire flight thinking about…

  • Leave the armrest for the middle seat passenger. The window seat passenger has the window, while the aisle seat passenger has the aisle, but the middle seat passenger has nothing, nada, zilch, so please, for the love of god, give the person in the middle seat something, anything, an armrest, please!
  • Do not hit the middle seat passenger in the head with your newspaper, even when the middle seat passenger is asleep and you are fairly sure they will not feel it.
  • Do not use the middle seat passenger’s tray table. Even if the middle seat passenger is not using it.
  • Do not put your feet under the seat in front of the middle seat passenger, no matter how long your legs are, even if the middle seat passenger is short.
  • Do not place your luggage underneath the seat in front of the middle seat passenger. The middle seat passenger has luggage, too.
  • Do not bring aboard a pet, choose an aisle or window seat, and then expect to put the pet under the middle seat because it does not fit under your seat.
  • Do not raise the armrest between you and the middle seat passenger, no matter how well you are getting along.
  • Keep your hair away from the middle seat passenger, no matter how pretty or how manly it may be.
  • Remember, middle seat passengers are people too!

As I sat there, going over the middle seat rules, that hairy arm resting a little too comfortably against mine, I flashed back to another middle seat situation I’ve experienced often – the open middle seat.

WOOHOO! I always think, whenever I see that open middle seat. I can not believe my luck. Nor can the passenger sitting on the other side of that same middle seat. I try not to get too excited, because one of two things are about to happen, and it most likely won’t be the good thing.

THE GOOD THING: The seat remains open and I enjoy a relaxing flight home.

THE BAD THING: The passenger flings their jacket or purse or stack of magazines into the empty seat, claiming the space as their own.

If the good thing happens to you, and the seat actually remains open, fantastic. You’re on a roll. Now may be the time to fly to Vegas and continue this amazing streak of luck at a table of cards. And don’t forget to take me with you.

If the bad thing happens, now is the time to act, and fast! Hurry, throw something of your own into the seat. By doing this you are letting the passenger on the other side know that this is shared space. Not their space. Shared space. Trust me, this reminder is necessary if you want the flight to continue without further incident. When the passenger pulls down the tray table and places a drink or a book on top, immediately place something of your own next to it.
What are you waiting for? DO IT!

Juvenile, you say? Whatever. Do what you want. But you may soon find a pair of bare feet rubbing against your leg. Oh it happens. It’s happened to me. Don’t let it happen you.

Do you have a horrible middle seat story to share? I’d love to hear all about it.