When a Delta plane arriving from Salt Lake City landed in Phoenix yesterday, one man opened the emergency exit door at the back and got off by hopping off the wing. Or perhaps he climbed down? Regardless of how he got off, he was apprehended, naturally, and could be in bigger trouble than he anticipated.
To his credit, the plane was at the terminal already, and other passengers were beginning to exit the front like normal people do. It wasn’t like he got off in the middle of the runway before the plane taxied to safety. People who apprehended him were runway personnel. One has to wonder what this guy was thinking and where he was going.
The man is old enough to know better–he is 37, but perhaps he was aiming to relive a school days experience when kids sometimes bolt off a school bus out the exit door. I remember that scenario happening on at least one occasion. It wasn’t me.
Maybe all those people struggling to remove the carry-ons they brought on the plane with them to avoid checked baggage fees made him snap. [via FoxNews.com]
Other tales from the skies Amazing and insane stories from a real-life flight attendant and co-pilot
One could keep a tally of flight experiences. Make two columns.
On one side write: “Great experiences where the crew and flight attendants were spiffy.”
On the other side write: “Travel misery where any minute you could go bonkers and take off your pants.”
Then, under each column, jot down those experiences that would fit under each. Geoff Vuleta does a similar activity in his article, “Tired and Impatient. Keep Your Pants On.” By the end I was laughing. Vuleta travels often and has seen it all.
From the women whose baby threw up on the both of them, but the attendant would not move the cart in order to let the woman pass by so she could get to the bathroom to clean up the mess– to the airline personnel who bought pizza for delayed passengers, he has an eye for what makes for misery, a bit of grace, and the absurd.
The part that made me laugh out loud was when Vuleta recounted how on one flight he was so flustered that he forgot where he was. When he took off his sports coat, he also took off his pants, neatly folded them, and put them in the overhead bin before starting to head down the aisle to claim his seat. It gave his traveling companion some comic relief.
Here’s an idea for anyone who wants to travel alone, but hates to travel alone when it comes to meal time. These odd thoughts came cavorting through my mind after seeing this story on a Today Show segment. Imagine the scene:
There you are all by yourself while others are paired up or in groups. You are sitting waiting for dinner, maybe reading but feeling a bit dissatisfied. Perhaps you feel like a target to unwanted advances. You wish you had a detractor. Something that lets you know that you are not alone–or at least, if you are alone, you have a way to feel differently. Or perhaps you are a bit shy and wish you had a conversation starter, something that would break the ice when talking with strangers. And if a creepy guy is lurking about, something that would send a signal “hands off.”
A fake baby might be the answer.
According to the segment, the fake babies look and feel real. That downy soft hair. The weight of them. The way they appear in a baby carrier.
Here’s a YouTube video about these fake babies which, for some reason, have a big following in Britain.
One woman interviewed on the Today Show said that holding her fake baby helps her feel calmer. Think about how this might work on the travel scene. Holding a fake baby could give you something to do if a flight is delayed or canceled. Instead of feeling riled up, you can stay calm.
Here’s another way a fake baby might be the ticket to travel bliss. A fake baby in a car seat might help with long drives and cut down on the tendency to talk on a cell phone while driving. The women interviewed said they talk to their babies. You could tell your fake baby your travel plans and concerns which could help pass time as you’re driving down a highway. If you’re lost, telling your fake baby about your direction woes might help you feel better.
Babies can also be people magnets. People will stop to coo over a baby which opens up the channel for other conversations. They’ed certainly be curious about your fake baby.
Dogs can work this way as well, come to think about it, but never mind, this is about babies.
As a person who has traveled with a real baby, I can imagine what it might be to travel with a fake one.
Once I set my son on top of a blanket pallet on a table of a restaurant in Krabe, Thailand when he was three months. He slept while I wrote. I enjoyed having his company, but there was a predicament when, after drinking coffee, water and a smoothie over the period of a couple of hours, I had to get rid of some of the liquid. I wouldn’t have worried about waking a fake baby up–or dropping him on the bathroom floor when trying to rearrange my clothes.
Just like leaving my son sleeping on the table wasn’t an option, leaving a fake baby isn’t an option either. They can cost up to $4,000. A little over $1,000 is common. If someone stole your fake baby, you’d probably feel sad. Angry even.
Actually, a fake baby traveling companion seems a bit odd to think about it–harmless, but odd.
What about dressing up a dog like a person? Now, that’s another thought. Some celebrities do it. You’ve seen the pictures. Nah. That seems as weird to me as a fake baby.
As an aside, yesterday I was talking to a woman who was holding a six-week-old baby. The baby was sleeping soundly, not moving. Guess what I thought of? Fake baby. These days, double check.
Here’s a link to Reborn Babies, a company that makes the dolls. There are several examples of what they look like.
Sarah Palin is in a corn maze. This does not mean that Sarah Palin is actually in a corn maze, but that there is a corn maze made to look like Sarah Palin. You have to be looking down on the maze and not in it in order to see the likeness. And it does look like her–and also Tina Fey.
I heard about this maze on News Update on Saturday Night Live and promptly checked out the story’s validitity. Yep, the maze is in Whitehouse, Ohio not too far from Toledo. Although the maze of Palin is new this year, The Corn Maze at the Butterfly House where it is located is not new.
Each year the Whitehouse Farm turns acres of corn fields into pictures. There is also an amazing intricate butterfly for wandering among the corn stalks. Corn mazes are one way farmers have upped their revenue in an unsure market. Elaborate pictures are not as common. Palin’s took eight hours to make after an artist made a sketch and figured out how to mow it using a GPS system.
Check out the farm’s Web site for a video of Palin’s maze. You can walk through Palin’s head (sort of a borrowed line from Saturday Night Live) Palin’s addition certainly adds something new to the fall line up of Ohio’s corn mazes.
Here is a YouTube video of a news clip of the Palin corn maze. The owner of the Butterfly House, Duke Wheeler explains how the maze was made and what other fun things his farm has planned.