If only it were that easy

Many people who write into the Plane Answers column have questions about what it takes to become a pilot. Little did they know, the answer lies in the genius of the online comic XKCD. Perhaps this is how the venerable Kent Wien reached the pointy end of the plane.

[Via XKCD]

Plane Answers: Crew rest seats and identifying pilot uniforms

Welcome to Gadling’s feature, Plane Answers, where our resident airline pilot, Kent Wien, answers your questions about everything from takeoff to touchdown and beyond. Have a question of your own? Ask away!

Ignacio asks:

Say you’re on a Boston-Paris trip. The flight is totally loaded up, so there are no free seats, neither First nor Tourist class. When it comes to rest-time, what do you pilots do? Is it possible for a scheduled flight to have no seats available?

The policy varies by airlines, but the FAA requires that a seat be provided somewhere in the back for the third pilot on flights over 8 hours. Whether that seat is in coach or business class is something that’s determined by contract negotiations. At my company, we’re lucky to have a seat in business, often with the seat next to us blocked as well.

Jocelyn asks:

Regarding airline pilot uniforms;

1. What is the difference between the different colored epaulets airline pilots wear on their uniforms. Some wear white and some wear gold, that I have seen.2. Is 3 stripes for a co-pilot and 4 stripes represents a captain?

3. Is there a 1 or 2 stripe epaulet and if so what is that rank or what do they do?

4. Does the hat have to match the epaulets i.e., gold band and gold leafs on the brim of his hat if he wears gold epaulets?

5. What is the gold or white band and why the gold or white leafs on the brim of his cap?

I never imagined there could be five questions relating to epaulets and uniforms, but I’m thrilled with the unique query.

Individual airlines can choose, often with their employees’ input, the color and style of uniform. The more modern pilot uniforms have moved to thinner stripes on the jacket sleeve for example.

Four stripes on either the shirt epaulets or the jacket sleeve are reserved for the captain, and three stripes for the co-pilot. Years ago we had mechanics who were licensed as professional flight engineers on the 707, 727 and DC-10 at my airline and those non-pilots sported two-stripes on their sleeves. There was no retirement age for these professional flight engineers, so you would occasionally see an FE in his 70’s flying the DC-10 before they were (both) retired.

Later, when qualified pilots were hired to work as flight engineers, they were given three stripes when sitting at the sideways seat.

Captains can also be identified by the ‘scrambled eggs’ on the brim of their hats and some airlines have slightly different design on the captain wings, occasionally adding a star, for example. The color of the epaulets, scrambled eggs and trim is again decided by the airline, but silver and gold are the most common examples.

I’ve seen thin single or double stripes used on the sleeves that are now reserved for flight attendant uniforms.

Do you have a question about something related to the pointy end of an airplane? Ask Kent and maybe he’ll use it for the next Plane Answers. Check out his other blog, Cockpit Chronicles and travel along with him at work. Twitter @veryjr

Plane Answers: A controller opinion on the JFK kid and a college major for pilots

Welcome to Gadling’s feature, Plane Answers, where our resident airline pilot, Kent Wien, answers your questions about everything from takeoff to touchdown and beyond. Have a question of your own? Ask away!

A friend of mine who works as an air traffic controller emailed me with his thoughts on the JFK ‘bring your kid to work’ controversy. Here’s what he had to say:

Each of my 3 kids have talked to planes in Chicago airspace 7-10 years ago. I limited it to a frequency change after advising the pilot “it’s take your daughter to work day, standby for a frequency change.”

I recently mentioned it to some former colleagues who all said they had done something like that also. I believe that any clearances are clearly inappropriate but that there was no danger involved at JFK. The dad certainly would have been in the trainer jack with override capability.

So there you have it. I’m still hopeful that nothing more than a policy memo is sent out and that the controller(s) in question are able to come back to work as soon as possible.

And now a multiple-part question from Ricardo about a university major for a prospective pilot and the best direction he should take afterwards:

Hey Kent,

I have always been interested in flying commercial aircraft ever since I was a child. My ultimate goal is to gain an ATPL. I am currently 16 years old and I’m already looking through colleges. I have found several that offer a Private Pilot minor but I do not know what to major in. Do airlines look for pilots that majored in something in particular? I was thinking of aerospace engineering or aerospace systems technology but I would like to know for sure what I should major in so that I will have better luck with airlines in the future.
I would suggest that you major in the subject that interests you most. Ideally it would be an area that you may be able to fall back on if the airlines aren’t hiring or you’re furloughed for a period of time. So many of the pilots I’m flying with today are doing something else to supplement their income, whether it be managing a trucking company, working as an electrician or managing rental properties.

Airlines absolutely look for a bachelor’s degree, but the subject is far less important during the interview for most companies. So you may as well use the degree to make you well rounded.

Another question I have (bear with me, I have several) is how should I gain my flight hours? People have suggested that I should become an instructor and give flight lessons. What do you think?

I talked a bit about this in a recent Plane Answers here and here. Flight instructing is the most popular way to build flight time as a civilian pilot, although there are some other creative options such as TV/Radio traffic reporting, fish spotting, and banner towing.

You’ll learn a lot during the instructing and it’s a nice rating to keep active throughout your career, as you may end up teaching friends and family to fly someday. But don’t expect to earn much money during your instructing years. $20 an hour may sound livable, but keep in mind that’s $20 per flight hour. At least you’re getting paid as you accrue hours, something that isn’t possible when you’re working on your private pilot’s license or building time toward your commercial ticket.

My advice? Get the flight time any way that comes available. Hanging out at the airport where you learned to fly is the best way to take advantage of the opportunities as they arise. Fortunately, flight instructors spend a lot of time hanging out at airports.

Finally, do you think that I will have a chance at being hired by an airline in the future? I have heard that hardly any airlines are hiring now and I am feeling a bit nervous and cannot help but think that the industry may not improve and that I will be stuck with a license but no job in the future.

Very few airlines are hiring right now, but this is a cyclical business and that drought certainly can’t continue for the next five to ten years, unless the entire airline industry continues to shrink significantly. Pilot retirements will pick up in December of 2012, which is five years after the FAA raised the retirement age by the same number of years. So you may be in a good spot by then, but building time will be key.

Good luck on your quest and be sure to keep in touch!

Do you have a question about something related to the pointy end of an airplane? Ask Kent and maybe he’ll use it for the next Plane Answers. Check out his other blog, Cockpit Chronicles and travel along with him at work. Twitter @veryjr

Cockpit Chronicles: Frank’s final flight

It was time for Frank to go. Not because of a federally mandated retirement age, or because of a change in pension laws or fluctuations in the stock market. No, Frank had long ago decided that he was going to retire at the age of sixty. And he was sure of it.

Even when the retirement age was raised from sixty to sixty-five in 2007, Frank was still adamant that he’d be leaving at sixty. I’ve flown with this captain for more than a decade, on the MD-80, 737, 757 and the 767. We trained for six weeks together on the 737 when it first arrived in Boston and we even had the opportunity to take an empty seven-three out for a few ‘bounces’ in Sacramento for some take-off and landing practice that our company mandated for the first fifty crews flying the 737-800.

Over those years, I’ve listened to Frank discuss his upcoming retirement. He planned to drive his immaculately restored Morgan around New England and enjoy his grandkids. Maybe start another Morgan project or volunteer at the Owl’s Head Transportation Museum in Maine.

But once the retirement age increased to sixty-five, I honestly had my doubts Frank would actually go. He wasn’t the kind of pilot that complained incessantly about the job, or management, or his lack of seniority that resulted in fewer Paris trips and more Caracas layovers. So I had a hard time believing he’d retire at sixty.

Two years ago, Frank mentioned to me that he’d like me to fly with him on his last flight.

%Gallery-85512%”Keep your schedule open in October of ’09.” He said.

“Yeah, OK, Frank.” I replied.

It’s quite an honor to be asked to fly someone’s retirement flight-something I’ve been lucky to do once before with a dear friend. I gladly accepted.

I suspect my honorable position had something to do with my video and photography skills, since it’s always nice to have such a flight documented for posterity. I mean, there are plenty of co-pilots in Boston that are funnier, more entertaining and far better looking than me.

Alas, that October day finally arrived. But I wasn’t on the schedule with him. After Frank let me know which Paris trip he’d be flying, I scrambled to trade away two Caribbean one-day trips to fly on his trip. Frank suggested I try to pick up the relief pilot (FB) position since I’d be in a better position to take a few pictures of the event.

Captain Frank wasn’t normally senior enough to hold Paris, but the flight office managed to ‘displace’ another, more senior captain to make room for him to have a memorable Paris trip. A classy move, for sure, and the displaced pilot was only too happy to receive a paid trip off.

It’s customary to bring along family members for a retirement flight, so the captain brought his wife, son and daughter-in-law. The daughter-in-law was also an accomplished photographer, so that could have been her ticket aboard this flight-although, she actually did turn out to be funny and entertaining as well.

While driving to work, I called the chief pilot. Was there a chance we could see the traditional fire truck salute upon arriving back in Boston, I wondered? He promised to look into it. On the previous retirement flight I flew we didn’t get the water treatment in JFK. At the time, we were told there had been an emergency on the field that had them tied up, but I’ve also heard rumors that the fire hose retirement salute wasn’t happening anymore.

But maybe something could be arranged. I was successful in convincing the Paine Field airport fire department to give my retiring dad a water salute on his retirement flight almost ten years ago, so how much could have changed since then?

In operations, I met Frank and his wife Meredith, his son Drew and daughter-in-law Christine. The other co-pilot, Mark, was pulling up paperwork. Having two pilots on this over eight hour flight would allow all three pilots to take a staggered, two-hour break on each leg.

Frank’s wife, Meredith looked proud and excited about her husband’s final voyage. I think she was excited to be flying with her husband to Paris, a perfect place to celebrate such a transitional moment for them.

Frank’s son Drew is a pilot in the National Guard, flying KC-135s, the aerial tanker version of the Boeing 707. His wife Christine had an easy-going demeanor and I enjoyed talking photography with her. I knew we’d all have a good time.

I promised Frank I’d take a few pictures while we were at the gate and again above 10,000 feet. I also planned to shoot some video of his family when I was back on my crew rest break during the flight. In Paris the entire crew would celebrate the conclusion of his airline career at one of his favorite Parisian restaurants, “Le petit Prince.” Quite appropriate, since Antoine Saint-Exupéry, the famous French pilot, was the author of The Little Prince.

The flight over went smoothly and I invited Drew and Meredith to sit next to me when I was back for my crew rest break. I asked them a few questions and they shed a little more insight into Frank and his career while I had the camera rolling.

At the end of my two-hour break, I exchanged places with Frank in the left seat as he went back for his break and to visit with his wife.

The early morning arrival into Paris was smooth, and with the pressure on, Frank managed to kiss the ground, rolling just the first two front wheels of the main landing gear onto the pavement before the whole airplane gently settled to the ground. I’d have been tempted to quit there, and let the co-pilot fly the airplane home two days later, but all the landings-the icing on the cake, as I call it-were to be Frank’s on this trip.

It took a few minutes for the bus to show up, a fortunate thing, since I was able to take a few portrait type pictures of Frank next to the airplane just as the sun was coming up.

And now, the only painful part of the trip; the bus ride to the hotel in Paris. During the week, this ride can take an hour and fifty minutes, and this day was no exception. We all tried to sleep in the bus to make the time go by.

Our main celebration would have to start in the early-evening during our layover in the city. The crew bus arrived at the hotel before 9 a.m.-plenty of time to allow for a long nap. We agreed to meet up at 6 p.m. in the lobby before heading to dinner.

Frank and his family took a shorter nap and thus managed to get out to visit a few Museums in Paris. After crossing the Atlantic at night, sleep can be an irresistible activity despite the rock hard bed and wildly fluctuating temperature at our hotel. This time, I chose sleep over viewing “Whistler’s Mother” at the Musé d’Orsay. It wasn’t even close.

Downstairs at 6, we planned to take over the lounge the hotel provides us for the meeting before dinner. Unfortunately a New York crew had already moved in with an impressive spread of Monoprix-purchased cheese, wine and baguette, a staple diet of Paris-flying crews, and the reason most international pilots are 10 to 15 pounds heavier than their domestic counterparts.

Like a group of ducklings following their mother, we lined up behind Diane, the purser who bought the Champagne and two beautiful flutes to serve them in before heading downstairs to a lounge next to the lobby. The hotel was nice enough to let us use this room and Diane presented the Champagne glasses to Frank and his wife. The hotel let everyone borrow some restaurant wine glasses and we drank a toast to Frank and his family to a flawless 23-year career.

The eleven of us made our way over to Le Petit Prince for dinner. I sat next to Drew and we talked a while about the state of the industry and who might be hiring when he is ready to get out of the military.

Most of us ordered a salmon fillet that was scrumptious and relatively reasonably priced, not that Frank would let any of us pay for the dinner. Meredith ordered a creme brûlée and the chef lit a bit of alcohol on the top to caramelize the dessert. It made for a nice picture.

During dinner, I convinced Drew and Christine to hold off on dessert so they could pick up a ‘crepe Nutella’ on the way back to the hotel. I’m convinced it just isn’t a proper layover in Paris without this three euro scalding-hot chocolate dessert. So the two of them skipped desert and decided to make a run for the Eiffel Tower before it closed, since this might be one of the few times they get to Paris together.

After dinner, just outside the restaurant, I gathered the the crew and Frank and Meredith for a shot with the Pantheon visible in the background.

Not everyone had desert at the restaurant, so we found a perfect little street and enjoyed a crepe while a few other flight attendants had an italian-style ice cream.

Could this be the way I celebrate my retirement flight? I can only hope so.

On the way back to the hotel, Mark and I stopped off at the ‘water store,’ a grocery store that is frequented by everyone on their way back to their hotel rooms. Our pickup time wasn’t for another 14 hours, and since the rooms seem to get exceedingly warm in the middle of the night, savvy crews usually pick up a bottle of water and maybe something to eat for the next morning.

The next afternoon, as we checked in with security, Frank was asked if it was true that this was his last flight. “It is,” he responded, and the co-pilot, Mark didn’t miss a beat as she checked his I.D.

“It’s my first flight,” he said.

Frank elected to do the last walk-around, something normally reserved for the co-pilot, but I think he wanted to get one last trip around the airplane in before the flight. Not to mention it was a good photo opportunity.

After checking on his wife and family, Frank gave his window a quick wash by hanging out his side window and then briefed us on the departure. Mark gave Frank the next leg as well, meaning that he’d give up the flying duties to operate the radio on the return flight since it was Frank’s last trip. It was the least Mark could do, especially since this was also Frank’s 60th birthday.

We departed on-time, just after 1:30 p.m. from Paris and Frank flew a beautiful departure. Things were going smoothly, as they should. He even commented on just how well trimmed (true and straight) the airplane felt.

After my break, Frank again went back to sit with his wife.

In between listening to the other co-pilot, Mark, make his position report and a PA announcing the captain’s retirement to the passengers, I wondered how I would ‘celebrate’ my last flight.

I’m sure for me, as it was for Frank and my friend/flight instructor Mike, the retirement flight won’t have that ‘last day of school’ celebratory feel to it.

Of course you want to enjoy the trip, and hopefully make it memorable for your crew and your family, but in the back of your mind, there’s a dramatic voice saying, “Don’t screw up your accident-free career on the final flight!”

Case in point:

I know of a pilot at another airline who decided to do a fly-by in the form of a modified ‘go-around’ and cruise above the runway before coming back for his final retirement landing. I’m sure the phrase “what are they going to do, fire me?” ran through his mind.

To do a low pass in a jet isn’t as serene inside the cockpit as you might expect. As the airplane approaches the ground with the gear and flaps up, the enhanced ground proximity warning computers loudly announce “Too Low, Gear!” and a flap warning horn squeals.

But the three pilots in the cockpit that day had already thought of that, so they disabled the warning horns for their celebratory buzz-job. (To be fair, they were probably a few hundred feet above the ground, but how often do you get to write ‘celebratory buzz-job?’)

At any rate, the company wasn’t happy at all with this crew. The terms of the punishment for each pilot wasn’t disclosed, but I heard the FAA became involved, which is one way to make it a memorable last flight.

After the three of us had our breaks, it was time to begin the descent.

Frank knew there was a chance for a water-cannon salute from the Boston fire department. And since the secret planning was out, I offered him a tip before we left Paris.

“Whatever you do,” I said, “don’t stop midway under the water.”

I then showed him the video from the Virgin America inaugural flight to Orange County where the pilots did just that.

“You’ve got to keep going,” I implored. Co-pilots are like that. Always trying to make the captain look good.

After we were switched over to the Boston approach control frequency, we were offered a new arrival to runway 33 left. The lighthouse visual to 33L involved flying visually by hanging a right at Minot’s Ledge lighthouse, descending to 1,800 feet and then turning left at the Boston Lighthouse where you can then go down to 1,000 feet before aligning with the runway over Fort Warren.

This was the first time any of us had been offered that arrival and I was impressed Frank jumped at the opportunity. What better way to go out than to fly a brand-new, scenic arrival into Boston. The “Boston Light” lighthouse was the last thing the British burned before exiting the colonies, and the Minot Ledge lighthouse sat on a rock with crashing waves below. It couldn’t have made for a more perfect ending to a career for Frank and I suspect he’ll remember that arrival for some time-it’s not likely to get mixed up among the hundreds of other approaches he’s flown into Boston.

As we taxied past terminal E to the far corner of the building and into gate 8B-a gate with very little room-my heart sank a bit when it became clear there would be no water salute for Frank.

Apparently they really aren’t doing this anymore for retiring pilots in Boston.

After saying goodbye to the passengers, many of whom congratulated Frank personally, we made our way back to the Boston operations, where our Chief Pilot, Rich, was waiting with a cake and Frank’s personnel file. The other pilots in ops as well as Frank’s family and I enjoyed a few pieces of cake and then said our goodbyes.

But in the eyes of the airline, Frank’s story wasn’t exactly over. No, he wasn’t to be reprimanded for buzzing two lighthouses and a fort.

You see, on the 17th of every month, pilots eagerly look up their schedule to see where they’d be flying, on what days and with which captain or co-pilot.

I did a double-take the next day when I saw which captain was on my schedule. Frank was to fly with me to London next month!

I gave him a call. Since he had bid ‘reserve’ for his retirement month, he was required to answer his phone and fly whatever trips the company had for him for the first two-weeks until he retired. But somehow the word hadn’t reached the company that Frank was officially retired.

“They’ve called me for two trips this morning,” he said.

It was Frank’s one last chance to come back to work, act like nothing happened and fly for another five years.

But he turned down the chance.

I put together a video for Frank, which is why this Cockpit Chronicles has been so delayed. I wanted to share it with you as well. Come along with us on Frank’s last trip. Think of it as the video version of everything you’ve just read. Still interested? Well then, here you go:

%Gallery-85512%

Cockpit Chronicles takes you along on some of Kent’s trips as an international co-pilot on the Boeing 757 and 767 based in Boston. Have any questions for Kent? Check out Plane Answers or follow him on Twitter @veryjr.

Galley Gossip: The Bachelor – airline employees, spouses & why Vienna is perfect for Jake

If you think long distance dating is difficult, try being married to an airline employee. It ain’t easy. Because working for an airline is not just a job, it’s a lifestyle, a very unusual one. Even now, seven years later, my husband, a man who travels more often than I do, doesn’t completely understand how things work in the aviation industry and will often times get frustrated whenever we’re discussing our travel schedules. That’s because my schedule, much like a pilot’s schedule, can change at a moments notice, making it difficult to create long term plans. I work holidays and weekends and I’m away from home for days at a time. Not many people can handle that.
Pilots, for the most part, are type A personalities. They’re logical thinkers who remain calm, cool, and in control as they command the aircraft. Think Captain Sullenberger. There’s no room for emotion when faced with ditching an airplane into the Hudson River. Flight attendants, on the other hand, tend to be caretakers. We can pretty much make do in just about any situation. There’s a reason why so many flight attendants end up on reality television shows like Survivor, Amazing Race, etc. Now they say opposites attract. I believe it. So is it any wonder that many pilots and flight attendants wind up having relationships with people who are completely different from themselves? Quite a few pilots tend to choose nurturing types like flight attendants, nurses and teachers, while a lot of flight attendants seem to get involved with pilots, police officers and firemen. Makes sense.
In my last post, The Bachelor – pilots, fashion & a few pilot fashion tips, I mentioned that I’m a fan of the reality television show The Bachelor. Well it just so happens that this season the man in command of the rose ceremony is a pilot named Jake. I truly believe that Vienna, one of the final four contestants, will be the last woman standing. What can I say, I always go for the underdog. Also, I admire strength in the face of adversity. Oh, sure, Vienna’s a little immature, sharing intimate details of her dates with Jake that would have been better left unsaid, but she’s young, thinks she’s in love, and excited about what the future may hold. No one is perfect. So why would I choose the wild child who rubs everyone the wrong way, the woman who snuck into bed with the captain of her dreams only to be turned away and sent back to where she came from? Two reasons: 1. She has the type of personality that can handle life as a pilot’s wife. 2. The psychological effect of fear.

In college I studied psychology and wound up taking a class on human sexuality. That’s where I learned all about the power of fear. It can paralyze a person. I can’t tell you how many passengers I’ve met over the years who are afraid to fly, who completely freak out at the mere hint of turbulence. Fear can also save a life. It’s called your sixth sense. One should always trust it. You may be surprised to learn that fear also has a lesser known, more interesting effect on humans. It has been shown that men find women more attractive when they’re scared.

Remember Jake’s one on one date with Vienna? More specifically, remember the bungee jump nervous breakdown? Jake, it turns out, is afraid of heights. But he’s a pilot! I know. How can a pilot who spends a majority of his time at 30,000 feet be afraid of heights? Simple. In an airplane Jake is in control. But jumping off the side of a bridge is a completely different story. So when Vienna, quite naturally, found herself comforting Jake as he tried to catch his breath before taking the giant leap, I thought to myself, perhaps she’s the one. Finally, hand in hand, Jake and Vienna took the plunge. That’s when I knew she had an edge over the other women in the house. Then, as the two of them bounced a few feet above the ground, face to face, embracing each other tightly and kissing passionately upside down, I felt like she might be the one to walk away with the final rose. I’m glad, because I think Vienna is perfect for Jake.

Early on in the show Vienna was scorned by the other women in the house. Basically she’s pretty much been on her own from the very beginning. It takes strength to put up with a house full of catty women, and Vienna handles it with a smile on her face. Whether or not you like the girl, you have to give her props for dealing with a difficult situation quite beautifully. I don’t think I would have been quite so nice. This tells me that Vienna is a survivor. I mean if she can handle Ali’s temper tantrum at the second to last rose ceremony, she can handle just about anything. Not to mention, she also seems like a lot of fun, capable of putting a smile on Jake’s face in any situation, even the awkward ones.

Jake should choose a woman who is not only nurturing, but also independent since she will spend half the month alone. Jake will be away at least twelve days a month. Because of this he needs someone strong, confident, and loyal, a woman who can deal with last minute changes and can also make spur of the moment decisions that include back up plans A, B, & C – just in case something goes wrong, because when you work for an airline, something is bound to go wrong. Take it from me, a flight attendant, this is not an easy combination to find in a partner. Here’s why the other women are all wrong for Jake…


  • GIA: Smart, sweet, and drop dead gorgeous, Gia has it going on. She’s the perfect woman. If I were a man, she would be the one. If Jake weren’t a pilot, I would root for her. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if Gia ends up one of the last two women standing at the alter. But because Gia admitted in the last episode that she doesn’t always feel secure, which is not a good thing when married to a person who isn’t always around to boost the ego, I don’t think she’s the perfect match for Jake.
  • ALI: No doubt about it, Ali is the most outspoken woman in the house. At times she comes off as a you-know-what. Instead of focusing on Jake, she’s chosen to put all her energy into hating the competition, Vienna. Not a good sign. Marriage is work. It’s not easy to remain focused on the positive, on what made you fall in love with your partner in the first place without life distracting you from what’s truly important. Can a person prone to jealousy and negativity handle a life with someone who is constantly surrounded by adoration from both men and women? I doubt it.
  • TENLEY: Sensitive and sweet, she’s a likeable girl with a big heart. I can see why Jake would be attracted to her. But in the long run, she might be too fragile for Jake’s lifestyle after being involved in a failed marriage to the one and only man she’s known intimately, a man who abandoned her for another woman. Jake’s a pilot. Each and every month he will have to leave her in order to go to work. Is Tenley strong enough to handle all those nights at home alone? I don’t think so.
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Don’t forget to tune in tonight at 8pm on ABC for the exciting hometown date episode of The Bachelor.

Photos courtesy of The Bachelor web site.