Top four strangest hotel requests

by Tom Johansmeyer on

What do you ask for when you visit a hotel? I tend to like a bathrobe that has all its belt-loops intact and a desk that is as far away from the bed as possible. Also, I’m a stickler for service. Well, apparently my needs are pretty conventional. Best Western just put out a list of the most unusual demands made by guests, according to the Sydney Morning Herald, showing just how weird people can be.

You may have a vivid imagination, with an uncanny ability to sense the absurd and see it crystallize in your mind. Well, I’m here to tell you that you’re an amateur. You have to be pretty unusual even to think of the unique stuff people have requested from hotels.

Take a look below at the four strangest hotel requests out there. 1. Spiriting and healing pets: Reiki for animals … really? Who gets an idea like this?

2. I like to watch: One group wanted a chaperone for sex addicts, although, I think the other word for this is “spectator.”

3. The blues: There was a party that wanted a meal comprised only of blue food. I’m wondering if it was a technicality to get kids who objected to “greens” to eat their vegetables.

4. A desire to labor: A lawnmower convention organizer asked if his guests could cut the grass on the grounds, in order to demonstrate how the products work.

According to the Sydney Morning Herald:

“We always try to accommodate our guests’ requirements – no matter how off the wall they may be,” said Tim Wade, head of marketing at Best Western. Although he admitted that a visit from members of The Tall Person’s Club of Great Britain had to be put on hold after the hotel in question were unable to locate enough seven-foot beds.

So, how strange are you? Leave a comment and let us know the weirdest thing you’ve craved – or even asked for – at a hotel.

[photo by .guilty via Flickr]

Australian customs pushes foreigners on porn

by Tom Johansmeyer on

Tourists and business travelers are getting annoyed with the Australian government. Hey, nobody likes airport security and customs employees in any country, but this time, the Aussies have just gone too far. In an attempt to pacify fundamentalist Christians in the country, the authorities decided to target porn.

And hilarity ensued.

According to TechEye, “[S]ince that would not go down well with your average Aussie, they decided only to scare the hell out of foreigners coming into the country.”

Basically, porn is only bad if it’s carried by foreigners. Australian-carried skin flicks are good to go. There’s no indication of whether the fundamentalists weighed in on this. But, it’s safe to assume that it really is the foreigners that make porn bad, not the locals.

So, how can you get busted for toting the collected works of Seka down under? First, you’re asked to ‘fess up on the landing cards. And, they want to know how you’re bringing your nightlife substitute porn into the country: computer, camera or phone. The risks associated with lying are high, TechEye notes: “The risk for a tourist was that if a border patrol sniffed their computer and found boobies they could be deported, or fined on the spot.”This is pretty much where the hilarity kicks in:

According to the Australian Sex Party spokesman Robbie Swan, one case involved a couple on their honeymoon, who thought they had to declare naked iPhone pictures of themselves after reading the incoming passenger card.

This does sound like a pretty awesome fmylife submission … especially because the couple was forced to show the photo while in line with other people.

Unsurprisingly, the government realizes it may need to change the rules, at least because the average foreigner probably doesn’t know how “pornography” is defined under Australian law. So, they either need to show their material to someone in a face-to-face situation or rely on the ol’ Justice Potter Stewart standard, which has served the United States so well … “I know it when I see it.“

[Via The Awl, photo by lucyfrench123 via Flickr]

Want to get lucky on the road? Look on Wednesday, act on Thursday

by Tom Johansmeyer on

Feeling amorous on the road? Well, the best day to act on that urge is probably Thursday. Avoid people on Tuesdays, since that’s when a crappy mood is most likely, and save Monday’s for relaxation (and to avoid a heart attack). This may sound like strange advice, but it comes straight out of a study in the British Medical Journal.

The progression actually makes a lot of sense. The study suggests looking for love (or, I assume, lust) on Wednesday, calling it “ideal for a first date,” according to 40 percent of the 8,000 singles polled. So, cruise the hotel bar for some temporary bliss, but don’t act on it right away! Thursdays are for sex. And to help you seal the deal, Wednesday is the best day to ask for a raise, so you’ll be able to line your pockets to finance the big push, so to speak.

Thursday, remember, is your day for action. Natural cortisol energy levels hit their peak, The Sun writes. Get up early when testosterone and estrogen are up to five times higher, and take full advantage of what nature’s giving you. Then, shower, grab a quick bite from the hotel’s continental breakfast and get off to that morning meeting!

[photo by Melissa Audrey via Flickr]

Sex over service? Airlines try vixen pitch with passengers

by Tom Johansmeyer on

It’s no secret that airline customer service is generally perceived to be as pleasant as a root canal. I was thinking about this over the weekend, as I walked home from Penn Station, after catching Amtrak’s Acela back from Boston. I had a fantastic trip (up and back) and was hung up on the contrasts to air travel.

Later that night, I met a friend for a glass of wine and talked through the issue, particularly the airline side of it. It feels like most of the major carriers aren’t making an effort to repair public exception, with notable exceptions like JetBlue. In almost any other industry, routine public perception being so low would trigger a crisis-caliber response.

Not the airlines, though …

I got my answer today, with a story that passed through my Twitter stream: sex sells. Instead of trying to build and maintain a solid image, an airline could just give up, and try to win new passengers the old fashioned way. And indeed, it is the old fashioned way, as anyone who remembers National Airlines’ 1971 commercial with flight attendant Cheryl Fioravente’s invitation: “Fly me.”

[Image credit: Flickr/Rachel Kramer Bussel]


Cathay Pacific isn’t going to that extreme, but it is making an effort to seduce passengers with shots of eye-candy that has yet to hit The Big 3-0. The flight attendants, uniformly hot in uniform and not, pose alongside quotes that could read from a customer service manual or a personal ad: “I just like to listen more than talk” and “Nothing beats a smile for turning strangers into friends.”

Who wouldn’t want to hear that at boarding?

The Wall Street Journal notes that this is a departure from the advertising of the past few decades, in which airlines have sacrificed the sensual in favor of the practical: “comfort, convenience, low fares and fine in-flight dining.”

Of course, that approach hasn’t really been working too well, especially the comfort and convenience aspects. In addition to dealing with an abysmal image, the industry has to contend with tighter market conditions as a result of the post-financial crisis recession. There isn’t as much disposable income to go around, and passengers have to choose between flying and other forms of recreation. Business travelers can be more discriminating, when destinations permit.

Cathay Pacific isn’t alone: Air France has headed into sexier territory with its latest ad campaign, which the WSJ describes as having a “blonde model wearing a pink corset, its strings apparently being loosened by a miniature plane taking off.” The U.S. carriers aren’t there yet, but the overseas trend nonetheless makes me wonder if the approach should be on their radar.

It’s pretty clear that something needs to change for an industry that struggles to make a right move in the public’s eye, even in cases where such ire is unwarranted. Maybe it is best to stop trying to look good … and focus on superficial beauty instead.

Ten steps to turn the passenger next to you into a fling (or more)

by Tom Johansmeyer on

Want to get lucky on your next flight? The odds of initiating a perfect stranger into the mile-high club are pretty slim, even if you do know all the right things to say. Of course, you could have a conversation, make a connection and want to make it real on the ground. So, how can that happen? Plugging in and tuning out aren’t going to help you much. Instead, you have to roll the dice and be social, risking a long talk with a total dud. It’s still worth a shot: even a long flight is finite.

So, let’s look at 10 ways you can pursue love or lust in the friendliest of skies:

1. Stop working: focus on your career while you’re in your seat, and that’s all you’ll find waiting for you on the ground. Close your laptop. Put down those reports. Clear the tray table in front of you. Crack a smile.

2. Buy a drink: it works in a bar, right? Spring for a glass of wine or a mini-bottle of vodka. In addition to being nice, you’ll also have a great way to start a conversation, especially if the flight attendant does something nutty.

3. Start listening: and to something other than your iPod. A winning conversation starts with your ears (and this is the only way you’ll find out if your seatmate is your kind of crazy).

4. Do a little talking: everyone loves a great listener, but you have to put some skin in the game to (especially if that’s ultimately your goal … so to speak). Chat up your neighbor, and be both honest and realistic. For a long-term connection, this is a must; for a quick jaunt to the back of the plane, it’ll take more than some quick talking.5. Make plans: whether you’re looking for a 30,000 foot liaison or something more enduring, make plans. It’s great to take what happens on a plane into the real world, so trade business cards and personal cell phone numbers. If all you want to do is make it back to the lav, plan that mad dash shortly after the beverage service starts.

6. Take advantage of open seating: for flights on the Delta Shuttle and Southwest, for example, board in the middle of the pack (great advice from USA Today). You’ll get a good idea of your choices and will still have plenty of seats available. Just don’t do this on easyJet. You’ll never hear the end of meeting someone on easyJet.

7. Use business cards: you don’t need cards to swap information, but it is a lot easier. Jotting digits down on a napkin is risky, and handwriting becomes an issue. Don’t leave anything to chance!

8. Leave the airport together: if you’re going the same way as your new buddy, extend you trip a little. Offer to a share a cab or town car (or whatever ground transportation you choose). You’ll put a bit more time on your side.

9. Set it up: never leave sales call without scheduling your next one. Before you part ways, try to line up your next encounter. Then, all you’ll have to do next time is show up!

10. Hope for the best: who knows where it’s going? Cross your fingers, find a shooting star and carry your lucky penny.

[photo by hoyasmeg via Flickr]