SkyMall Monday: Top 10 SkyMall Mondays of 2008

2008 was a big year for SkyMall Monday in that, you know, I created SkyMall Monday in 2008. We laughed, we cried, we grew as people. But mostly we just laughed. With the new year just days away and with everyone and their mother posting year-end top 10 lists, this week seemed perfect for a look back at the Top 10 SkyMall Mondays of 2008. So, grab your credit card, throw logic out the window and come along on a magical ride through some highlights from our favorite mile-high catalog.

10. TimeMug – Certainly many of you have made a new year’s resolution to get yourselves organized. Well, what better way to get your life in order than to have a clock on your coffee mug? You may have left your watch at home and forgotten your phone in the car, but your latte will know exactly how late you are for your meeting.

9. Slumber Sleeve – Easily the second-best pillow of the two pillows SkyMall Monday reviewed this year! The Slumber Sleeve allows contortionists and husbands who have been forced to sleep on the couch to maintain bloodflow to their extremities. It’s a niche market, but the Slumber Sleeve really filled it up good and tight.
8. Flair Hair Visor
– As a bald man, I’m typically offended by anything that makes us aerodynamic individuals feel as if we should hide our glorious domes. But when you come across a product that is so dignified and subtle, you can’t help but promote it. The Flair Hair Visor says, “I have such tremendous self-esteem that I am certain you must be pointing at me and laughing as a gesture of respect.” I accept your compliments.

7. Portable Desk – You’re a man (or woman) on the go and you just have to work, work, work! But there’s nowhere to sit as you wander around the coffee shop/airport/freeway. What do you do? Well, you strap it on. (Note: Thank you to my editor who looks the other way when I use that phrase).

6. Noseaid – When you care enough about your child to put a clothespin on his nose and then just walk away.

5. SkyRest Travel Pillow – Getting comfortable in a cramped airplane seat can be tough. Trying to sleep in that seat is even tougher. You could try a neck pillow, but they’re so small, convenient and easy to carry. What you need is something so obtrusive that everyone knows that you’ll be sleeping through the drink service. You need a giant wedge that will block your neighbors from going to the bathroom. You need the SkyRest Travel Pillow.

4. Double Umbrella – Keeping two people dry in the rain is the world’s oldest problem. Sure you could buy a golf umbrella, but then you’d be a giant douchebag. You could carry around multiple umbrellas, but then you’d have the hassle of keeping then both up in bad weather. Or, you could own the world’s first umbrella built for two people who like each other but not enough to stand close together under one umbrella.

3. NECKpro Traction Device – Tethering yourself to a door is never a bad idea. So what better way to alleviate neck and back pain than to strap yourself to a door and crank yourself away from stress? And what a handsome design! Frankly, I’ll find any excuse I can to run this photo repeatedly.

2. The Slanket – As I began compiling this list, I thought for sure that The Slanket would end up in the number one spot. How could it not? It’s the original blanket with sleeves! I even spent an hour completely entranced by the incredibly cheesie Slanket website. But at the end of the day, I’m just not a blanket guy. I prefer to put on a sweatshirt. Our flaunt my tremendous wealth by turning on the heat.

1. Cruzin CoolerMany people have blamed the collapse of the Big Three U.S. automakers on their lack on innovation. Well, one amazing advancement in transportation has recently come from the great minds of America’s business leaders. I speak, of course, of the Cruzin Cooler. Part cooler. Part go-kart. All awesome. It holds 24 12-ounce cans and has a top speed of 13 miles per hour. But it’s not about the numbers. Facts and figures are so cold and emotionless. SkyMall Monday is about people. I believe in bringing you hope and joy and warmth. To that end, just look how pleased these Cruzin Cooler owners look.

Happy New Year, SkyMall Maniacs. See you in 2009 with a whole new batch of products designed to make our lives more magical.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.

SkyMall Monday: SkyRest Travel Pillow

I suppose it’s about time that I used my SkyMall Monday bully pulpit to review a product that is directly related to travel. Sure, you could use the Double Umbrella on a trip to London, but what about when you’re en route to your destination? How will you arrive there well-rested and prepared to make the most of your time away from your empty, passionless life? Well, you’ll rest easy on your flight if you have the SkyRest Travel Pillow.

You could certainly purchase an airline pillow covered in lice and chlamydia or carry along one of those horseshoe shaped neck pillows that scream, “I’m a loser.” But studies have shown that the human body’s natural sleeping position is seated upright while the head and neck are tilted forward at a 68.4 degree angle. What studies? Hey, look over there!

Available only in dark seafoam green, the SkyRest Travel Pillow is inconspicuous and allows you to sleep while your fellow travelers are none the wiser. And it’s inflatable, so you know you’ll sleep like a baby once you have exhausted yourself filling it with air. Considering that it’s 14″ wide, 12″ deep, 11″ tall in the front and 17″ tall in the back, you’ll most likely have it inflated in time for the person next to you to take her first bathroom break. At which time I’m sure you’ll easily be able to move it out of the way for her.

And the best part? Since it rests on your lap, when the person in front of you reclines his seat, the pillow will be pushed back into you. It’s like getting a face massage in a fancy spa…but for free!

Just look at what the product description has to say about this fantastic product:

Why not join our many thousands of satisfied customers and enjoy the benefits of this uniquely different and very flexible travel pillow.

Yes, people who use this product like to be influenced by peer pressure and abhor proper punctuation. And while I have never actually seen any of these satisfied customers in person, I am sure that this person wishes that she had purchased the SkyRest Travel pillow before her flight. Don’t make the same mistake she did!

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.