I’m heading out first thing this morning to fly to see family in Chicago. I dread several things. The over-cheery
flight attendants whose sing-songy “good morning” always grates. The sour rank of airline coffee. And, of course, the
armrest glutton. The latter is someone I’ve dealt with oh too many times, and I’ve learned a few tricks along the way.
For example, if the armchair glutton next to you is a child, and is proving particularly intransigent about sharing the
armrest, then merely explain to him that there is a horrible childhood disease going around, and to determine if you
have it, you extend your arm as straight as it will go. If the arms touch the front chair, well, get yourself checked.
When the child extends his arms…well, that’s your cue. Take that armrest as your own and console the child…it’s only
something I read, you might say. Well, there are other tips I can help you with. But this is a good start.