How much loot is this woman carrying?

“Valuables? I don’t have any valuables.”

After putting together my post on Five sexy ways to carry your valuables safely, I was contacted by the PortaPocket folks to give their discreet, put-anywhere pockets a try.

PortaPockets are made from lightweight, coated neoprene, making them comfortable and hygienic, as well as very slim. They are made to be worn on the ankle, calf, thigh, arm and waist, but you can fit them almost anywhere (not that there are a lot of other places) and adjust them to your ideal size. The pockets themselves can be either threaded or velcroed onto the straps, and their gentle padding makes them serve as protective cases for phones and other valuables — even when you aren’t wearing them.

So now, the test. I tried on four filled PortaPockets with two different outfits. Can you see them?

The PortaPocket items I tested cost $12.95 to $23.95 per set and can be purchased here.