T-Shirt Profiling

by Erik Olsen on

Be careful what you say at the airport…and what you wear. Or so seems to be the case at JFK airport recently. Raed Jarrar walks through security at the airport ,gets the double-check treatment (fine, happens to everyone), but then after he sits down to enjoy a delicious meal of grapes, cheese and orange juice (terrorist food, if ever there was such a thing), he gets the third degree from an airport cop and the Jet Blue lady . His crime? Wearing a t-shirt that read (in both English and Arabic), “we will not be silent”.

Obviously assuming that he is not a member of the Deaf Mute Association of America, he’s questioned rather intensely and asked if he has another shirt he can put on. He refuses and is asked if they can all “end this the nice way”. By that I assume she meant put on another t-shirt and then enjoy some tasty blue chips with your grapes.

Look, I’m as frightened of terrorists on planes as the next guy, but simply wearing a shirt in Arabic smacks of pure profiling silliness. No? Correct me if I’m wrong. You can read his acount here.

Pilot Locks Self Out

by Erik Olsen on

Here’s one to make you feel more comfortable about air travel.

The pilot of an Air Canada Jazz flight left the cockpit to use the men’s room (no doubt checked himself out in the mirror, as we all do…airplane mirrors are so flattering) and then found himself unable to get back into the cockpit. Thankfully, he’d not left the plane on auto-pilot, but in the hands of the First Officer. There was also a flight attendant in the cockpit. (one wonders what they were doing). Anyway, turns out that when the pilot returned, the door was locked and the pilot couldn’t get back in. He knocked and the folks inside tried to help him open the door, but alas, nothing could be done.

Long story short, they had to take the hinges off the door to open it. But the rest of the crew and the passengers no doubt sat and watched with their jaws open. But, yes, the plane was landed and all was right with the world.

The Zen of Mission Impossible III

by Erik Olsen on

In the tragic wake of Tom Cruise’s dismissal from Paramount comes a hilarious story from the Washington Post on the misery cum bliss of watching the latest Mission Impossible installment. If you’re like me, then the idea of spending over two hours consuming this dreck is enough to make you choke on a piece of popcorn. But for writer Stephen Hunter the exercise in watching the film, as he puts it “five times. In a row . In a stinkin’ row!” apprently deadened his skeptic nerve, as I like to put it. The film apprently put him into a kind of religious haze as buildings exploded and cars zoomed, leading him to conclude (rightfully, I suppose) that “in any form, seen in any direction, in any language, no movie is as full of perfect Zen emptiness as “M:i:III.”

Amen brother.

Politeness on Planes

by Erik Olsen on

And here I thought we were, for the most part, selfish, rude barbarians. Who knew we were so civilized?

Turns out that people, well, travelers at least, are really quite nice to each other, thoughtful, even. According to a new survey from Expedia, most air passengers admit they don’t fully recline their seats so as not to burden the folks behind them. Others ask permission before reclining. How nice! My faith in humanity is restored.

But seriously, one likes to hear this. I know that I never ask permission to drop the seat back, but when I do lower it back, I do so gingerly, to let the person know it’s coming and so I don’t spilll a drink or crunch a laptop. And I usually don’t put it all the way back, either. Dunno, I just feel like being on a cramped plane is bad enough. I don’t want to bum someone out by putting my head in their lap.

Turns out I am not alone. The Expedia survey said that 62 percent of people put the seat back just halfway. Thirteen percent don’t recline at all. Twelve percent don’t give a damn and throw that sucker back all the way … and all of them live in New York. (jk!)

Interestingly, according to the report, all of this politeness comes at a time when load capacities on planes are reaching 90 percent … yes, you read that correctly, and historically, airline load factors hover in the 60 to 70 percent range. So let’s keep it up folks. Let’s stay nice.

Declare the TNT, Sir

by Erik Olsen on

Good to know that the folks at Homeland Security are remaining vigilant about keeping explosives off of planes. This time around, it wasn’t some crazed terrorist with liquid nitro, but rather at college student traveling with a stick of dynamite which he checked in his luggage on a Continental Airlines flight from Argentina. A bomb-sniffing dog at the international arrivals area at George Bush Intercontinental Airport in Houston detected the dynamite, which belonged to Howard McFarland Fish. Fish told Houston authorities that he works in mining and often handles explosives. Hmm, sounds rather fishy, Mr. Fish.