Silicone breast explodes upon landing at Los Angeles airport

by Scott Carmichael on

Here is one you don’t hear every day – exploding breast implants (partially) caused by flying.

Irena D. was on her way from Moscow to Los Angeles on an unnamed airline.

When she boarded the plane, she was not feeling too well, but things really got out of hand when she stepped off the plane and collapsed. Apparently, one of her size F silicone implants had ruptured.

Doctors were quick to point out that the plane may not have been the main reason for the damage, but that the pressure difference could have accelerated an existing defect in the silicone product.

She is out of danger now, but is stuck in bed for at least a week. Doctors explained that she won’t be able to have the breast implant replaced, though I’m not enough of an expert to know why, nor was I aware that a simple defect in a silicone implant could cause it to rupture like this. You really do learn something new every day.

Think Irena D made waves on her flight? Click the images below to see what havoc these girls caused on their flights.


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Porn industry disgusted by flight attendant side job

by Tom Johansmeyer on

“Look, we all have standards,” an adult entertainer familiar with the full- and part-time work of Ryanair flight attendant Edita Schindlerova told The Independent. “I think it’s disgusting that she works for Ryanair. All of us here at Biggus Dickus Productions feel really let down by her. If only she had told us she worked for them, maybe we could have done something to help her. Now, she has lost all our trust. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m off to do a three way.”

If you’ve seen Monty Python’s The Life of Brian, you know not to treat “Biggus Dickus” as a joke name.

While many look down their noses at the porn business, it looks like the airlines are able to give even those in the skin biz someone over which to hold a sense of superiority. Of course, the porn folks could learn a lesson in tolerance from Ryanair, which doesn’t care about Edita’s side job as “Edite Bente.”

If you’re surprised to see the porn industry claim any sort of moral high ground, don’t be. Anyone who has spent a bit of time in this business has had to listen to more than a few hours of First Amendment tirades, claims of wanting to be left alone and so on and so on and so on. Yes, it can get tedious, even though some of it is warranted. Either way, it’s pretty crazy to see the porn industry piss all over the airline business. What happened to “live and let live”?Ryanair flight attendant Schindlerova was recently outed as a part-time porn star by London tabloid The Sun. Her employer doesn’t care, and she hasn’t denied the allegations. She was also featured in the airline’s 2009 calendar, a collection of the sexiest employees that the low-cost carrier has to offer.

Her cover was blown by a pilot who somehow stumbled upon her work. Either this was an incredible coincidence, or this guy, who has not had to see his name in the press, spends a hell of a lot of time cruising the web for porn.

Julia Molony, who covered this story for The Independent, suggests, “Watch out fro the free-orgasm-with-every-flight offer on a billboard near you.” Such naïveté … does she really believe that Ryanair would give “free” anything?

Okay, through some investigative journalism on my part, I’ve been able to find some of her night job work. This is absolutely not safe for work or around children.This is not an adult website, rather it is a Czech tabloid, but do understand that they are able to push the envelope a lot farther than we can in the United States.

See our first story on Schindlerova’s erotic escapades.

Ryanair flight attendant moonlights in porn

by Tom Johansmeyer on

When the crew yells, “Brace!” one Ryanair flight attendant probably looks for the cameras. London tabloid The Sun (NSFW) alleges that flight attendant Edita Schindlerova (hopefully under a shorter name) moonlights in porn – on video and the web. The sexy 22-year-old also makes an appearance in the airline’s 2009 calendar.

The sultry stewardess wore a bikini and a smear of grease in the calendar, but this would be considered fully clothed at her second job. At night, she operates under the name “Edite Bente” and helps people part with their cash. Thanks to The Sun‘s investigative reporting, a tough job for some reporter, involves baring a pair of 34Bs.

The people she works for have apparently taken a more enlightened attitude than one would expect, saying, “What people do before or after they work for Ryanair, or when they’re not working for us, is entirely their own business.”

He adds a few remarks about putting the comfort and safety of passengers first (without editorializing) and makes a comment about employees being able what to do what they want on their own time, as long as their not breaking any laws. He could have stopped there and remained on the high road, but he had to keep talking: “All this proves is that the best-looking girls fly Ryanair.”

Not everybody at Ryanair, however, is on board with Edita’s calling hobby. Her secret was discovered by a fellow Ryanair employee. Schindlerova claims, “I had this shit a year ago with a pilot with nothing better to do than check the internet.”

A friend from work remarked, “We had no idea what she was up to in her spare time.” This person astutely observed, “There can’t be many airlines who have porn stars serving drinks on flights.”

I guess this is the trade-off for having to pay to use the lavatory on a flight …

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Ugandan “booby traps” are a growing problem

by Scott Carmichael on

Police in Uganda are warning men about the dangers of breasts.

Gangs of women have been tricking men into sniffing their chloroform laced breasts, knocking them out. When the men awake, they are usually naked, and without any of the stuff they had when they thought they were about to have a night of passion.

The police have managed to capture one of the women and are currently focusing their attention on the source of the sedatives. In the meantime, if you are in Uganda, be careful whose boobies you plant your face in as you never know how (or where) you’ll wake up in the morning.

What other women are causing trouble in the travel world?


Big in Japan: Drinking breast milk and other bizarre fetishes

by Matthew Firestone on

Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, which means that a lot of people out there are searching for Mr. and Mrs. Right…

But, in this bustling modern day age of midnight deadlines and overtime-laden schedules, who has the time to put themselves out there and find true love?

Then again, for anyone keen on avoiding the trials and tribulations of the dating game, you can always take out a classified advertisement.

Although it may not be romantic, classified ads are certainly quick, easy and functional.

And, if you happen to be looking for something a bit more – how shall we say this – kinky, they’re also a great way of maintaining your anonymity.

In Tokyo, the much-loved Metropolis magazine runs what is perhaps the most famous classified ads section in Japan, especially for anyone out there with an unusual fetish.

In a special list compiled this week, Metropolis gave us all an insight into just how bizarre Tokyoites and resident foreigners can be.

Don’t believe me? Check this one out:

Breast milk wanted. British guy, 33, looking for a kind woman of any nationality, ideally under 40, who can feed a hungry boy. 100% confidential. My first time.

It gets weirder…keep on reading if you don’t believe me!

This Valentine’s Day, it seems that infidelity is in the air, especially since breaking the sacred bonds of marriage seems to be about as popular here in Tokyo as the new line of Luis Vuiton handbags.

Looking to put a bit of spice back into your married life?

Try having an affair!

Not sure where to start?

Here are some lonely people who can help you rekindle that old flame:

– Unhappily married man. Love humor, fun, relaxing, playing, thinking, sex, reading, learning, honesty, trust, really bad jokes, singing off-key. Hate vegetables, Bush, unhappiness.

– JM, married but tall, fit and very handsome, seeks woman for discreet meetings. I’m tired of marital days. Good-looking Caucasian or Asian girl preferred.

– Bored.in.my.marriage.com. Are you stuck at this address? If your husband doesn’t love, physically excite or listen to you, I’ll do it for him. For both of us. Lovers first.

– Fun sex friend. Seeking discreet sex friend for rendezvous in Shibuya. Ideally looking for a sex-starved married woman. I’ll bring the Viagra, you just have to bring yourself. Handsome, kind and fit American seeks married Japanese lady for nothing but good times! Remember, you only live once. So come on.

Of course, for those of us not into extra-marital affairs, there’s no shortage of strange fetishists out there looking for a special kind of love/lust this V-day season.

How strange is the dating scene in Tokyo you ask?

Let’s just say that the following classified ads certainly speak for themselves!

Kinky lady. Open-minded, uninhibited, wild, curious, humorous, good-looking, SJM, 30s, seeks female for kinky fun. Just licking and cleaning all her holes, and drinking and wearing her golden water!

Italian man, new in Kawasaki, wants chubby or quasi-fat lady to be with. Should enjoy eating. Any nationality.

(Here’s the kicker…)

A little different. 55-year-old Western businessman, into wearing diapers. Who wants to email me?

Wow – you know what? I think this Valentine’s Day, I’ll just settle for a cold beer and dinner for one at my favorite ramen noodle shop…

From all of us here at Gadling to all of you out there in cyberspace, hope you’ve found love this V-day season that doesn’t involve drinking breast milk, golden water (gross) and wearing diapers!

** All images sourced from the Wikimedia Commons Project **