British Airports on High Alert for Boob Bombs

Flickr user AngryWayne

Large breasts can get women out of a parking ticket or perhaps earn them free drinks at a bar, but they may also mean additional screening from airport security.

In a headline that seems ripped directly from a Conan O’Brien monologue, airport security agents are on the lookout for terrorists with explosive breast implants.

The United Kingdom’s Daily Mirror reports Heathrow Airport is on high terror alert after word that Al-Qaeda is plotting attacks on airlines flying out of London. With airport scanners able to detect volatile threats outside the body, not inside, Al-Qaeda’s chief bomb-maker, Ibrahim al-Asiri, allegedly devised an explosive that can be hidden in an implant or body cavity.

As a result of the new concerns, security lines at Heathrow and many major world airports are much longer than usual. The Mirror quotes one staff member who admits security personnel have been ordered to “pay particular attention to females who may have concealed hidden explosives in their breasts,” but didn’t go into further details.

With Homeland Security agents already under scrutiny for their often invasive search measures, what new screening measures will they implement? Will airline passengers agree to even more thorough screenings? After the shoe bomber Richard Reid was caught, fliers have had to take off their shoes. What measures would the TSA enact if a breast bomber strikes? Will female fliers above a C-cup be given their own security line?

Assuming the reports are true, how popular are these breast bombers at the Al-Qaeda annual social mixers?

Owner of largest fake breasts in Russia sues airline over “trauma”

Russian model Irene Ferrari is having the worst possible year – in June of 2009, she suffered from an exploding boob upon landing in Los Angeles, and now she is suing Swiss International airlines for another boob related incident.

According to Ferrari, strong turbulence on her flight made one of her breasts hit the seat in front of her, causing “bruises and strong pain in her left breast”. Doctors say her injury could have been worse, but that the breasts worked like airbags, preventing a more serious injury.

Ferrari says, she’s suing because the uncomfortable plane caused the injury. She claims she always flies in business class, in order to accommodate her ample bosom, but that the business class seats on this particular plane were not much larger than coach seats. She’s demanding €100,000 ($121,000).

Still, all this bad luck is paying off nicely for her – she received a healthy settlement from her previous accident, along with more cash from the French doctor who apparently provided her defective implant. For those interested – the implants are “size F”.

Silicone breast explodes upon landing at Los Angeles airport

Here is one you don’t hear every day – exploding breast implants (partially) caused by flying.

Irena D. was on her way from Moscow to Los Angeles on an unnamed airline.

When she boarded the plane, she was not feeling too well, but things really got out of hand when she stepped off the plane and collapsed. Apparently, one of her size F silicone implants had ruptured.

Doctors were quick to point out that the plane may not have been the main reason for the damage, but that the pressure difference could have accelerated an existing defect in the silicone product.

She is out of danger now, but is stuck in bed for at least a week. Doctors explained that she won’t be able to have the breast implant replaced, though I’m not enough of an expert to know why, nor was I aware that a simple defect in a silicone implant could cause it to rupture like this. You really do learn something new every day.

Think Irena D made waves on her flight? Click the images below to see what havoc these girls caused on their flights.



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