SkyMall Monday: Wrist Cell Phone Carrier

The older we get, the more forgetful we become. How many times have you misplaced your car keys? How often do you walk into a room and have no idea why you did so? If you had a nickle for every time you put your infant daughter on the roof of your car while you unlocked the door and then drove away with her still stashed up there, how rich would you be?

We all forget things from time to time. Whether it’s which pills to take, your own name or your alibi, it’s always embarrassing when your memory fails you. There is perhaps nothing more frustrating than losing your cellphone. You could try calling it but it’s often your only phone. You can have a friend call it, but you won’t hear it because you probably also forgot your hearing aid. Eventually, you just have to curl up in a ball and wait for the cold hand of death to reach you.

Well, not anymore! Now, SkyMall has decided that lost cellphones are a problem that can no longer be tolerated. This scourge must be thwarted. Rather than rummaging through your purse, checking your couch cushions and using a jeweler’s eye to inspect your dog’s anal cavity, you’ll always know exactly where your cellphone is. It’s strapped to your wrist in the Wrist Cell Phone Carrier.Who knew that your wrist could prove so useful? Sure, you could place your cellphone in your pocket, purse or, if you’re a middle-aged white man, on your belt, but that would only be moderately convenient. You’re a person on the go and need your phone constantly at the ready. Pockets are linty. Purses are filled with tampons and crumpled up tissues that look used but that your mother insists are clean. And those holsters just make you look like a douchebag. Clearly, the wrist is the only place to store your cellphone safely and with class.

Think that wrists are only for watches and masturbating? Well, does SkyMall have news for you. Take a look at the product description:

This innovative accessory uses sturdy Velcro to insure the safety of your phone and has been extensively tested by active joggers, cyclists, skate boarders, fishermen, hunters and business people.

Is there anything more innovative than Velcro? Plus, apparently it provides insurance, which is something that even the President and Congress are having difficulty doing. I only wish we knew how race walkers felt about it.

What a relief that we’ll never have to worry about losing our cellphones again. Now we can focus all our energy on remembering, um, to, er, what was I going to say? Shoot. Cellphones…memory…then I wanted to tell you to…uh…pick up milk…take the blue pill…dang it. Whatever. Just get the Wrist Cell Phone Carrier and you can call your spouse. Lord knows that they’ll remind you of everything you forgot.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.


Daily deal – 15% off any Proporta branded item at Proporta.com

Today’s daily deal is a bit special as it isn’t just a one day deal.

Last week I started a giveaway for 2 Proporta gadget bags. Proporta was so happy with all the responses, that they decided to say “thanks” by creating a special discount just for Gadling readers (you still have till Thursday afternoon to enter the Gadget bag giveaway!).

If you head on over to Proporta.com, you’ll be able to snag a sweet 15% discount on any Proporta branded item!

Of course, this means that you’ll be able to order the gadget bag for just $40.76, or another of my favorites; the universal emergency charger.

To get the discount, simply place your order, and enter coupon code GADLING in the “promotional code” field, that’s all there is to it. Ordered something cool you’d like to share? Feel free to leave a comment!

Horchow baggage sale

Horchow is currently having a 20% off sale on all luggage and accessories. Impressing your family and friends at the holidays just got one-fifth easier.

You may have already heard about this season’s fabulous new Samsonite Blacklabel Trunk Collection, pictured, with which I’m personally kind of obsessed. The 1920’s trans-Atlantic inspired look of the trunks make me feel like I’m in a slightly more anachronistic Titanic. But in a good way. Wait, is there a good way? “A woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets.”

In any case (haha), the must-have collection is included in the sale.

The bad news is that a lot of this stuff is back-ordered and won’t ship out until November 21st, but it still might get to you in time for Thanksgiving, and definitely in time for the major holidays.

Don’t want to be in Titanic? Did you cheer when Jack let go? Then I recommend this set of “Safari” Croc-Embossed Leather Luggage from Bric’s. Chic, classic, and some of these items aren’t even sold out. Bonus!