Went to Beijing without your condoms? Buy a bus card

Safe sex is going high-tech in Beijing. The old, bright yellow coin-operated condom dispensers were finally ditched by the city’s authorities. They will be replaced by state of the art vending machines that look more like touch screen ATMs than the final stop for those who are about to get their naughty on. The government has installed 411 of the machines already. thousand’s more will be popping up over the coming months. They will be located near bars, nightclubs, in hotels, and adjacent to construction sites.

The Beijing AIDS Prevention Committee has made a deal with the city’s public transportation arm. All you have to do is swipe your OneCard (used for bus and subway fares) and out comes your prophylactic (which costs 5 yuan). And it talks too. (No, not the rubber, the machine). The brightly lit LCD screens will broadcast safe sex and anti-AIDS messages throughout the day.

[via Danwei]

Missing in Mexico: 5000 condoms, one truck and an inflatable “banana”

Attention Gadling readers in Mexico; keep your eyes open for a truck carrying 5000 condoms, 800 HIV tests and one 23 foot inflatable banana (wearing a condom).

The truck should stand out in traffic, because the sides are painted with that same banana, which from what I understand, is not a standard factory delivered color.

The Condomovil was parked outside a house in Mexico City, but by morning it was gone. Police have no idea what the motive could be (I can think of several reasons). The value of the stolen truck and its contents is about 200,000 Pesos, a little over $18,000.

The truck has been touring Mexico since 1998, and the project has since handed out over 1.2 million condoms. Unless the Condomovil is found, the project will be canceled which would be quite a blow to the Mexican federal health department.

Global sex report: Indians are sexually frustrated

According to a Durex global survey, Indians are not sexually satisfied — only 46% of them manage to orgasm. Not quite what you’d expect from the land of Kamasutra and erotic sculptures.

India today is strongly influenced by Western culture, however it is not yet free from its traditional shell, something that gives rise to much hypocrisy. For example: India wanting to ban cheer leaders in a cricket tournament because they are vulgar, but then Bollywood film songs are provocative enough to be classified as erotica.

Sex is still a taboo subject in the country (it’s almost synonymous to porn), there is no sex education in schools (culturally immoral?), and anything to do with the word is suppressed. Not being able to enjoy sex stems from inhibitions and ingrained conservative cultural beliefs, all that rise from tradition and severe lack of openness in society.

Or could all this be rubbish and it really has to do with the fact that the “thingis” of Indian men are too small?

Oh well, at least India has scored higher than the Japanese and Chinese who with only 27% and 24% (respectively) managing to reach orgasm, have been pronounced the countries that have the worst sex. Italians, Spaniards and Mexicans have the best sex lives with 66% of them reaching orgasm.

Indian Villages Rattled…Shaken…but More Satisfied

Sorry to scoop Willy on this one, but more news from the world of latex. Strangely, India, the land of the Kama Sutra, bans pornography and sex toys (but not condoms).

Now, according to the BBC, an Indian company and the Indian government have teamed up to bring to market a condom that vibrates. At about $3 for a pack of 3, this product has stirred up more than it’s users. Problem is: if it waddles–or vibrates, in this case–like a duck, is it a duck?

The government backed the launch to promote condoms to be used to slow the spread of AIDS. (A huge problem in India, as they have the world’s largest population of people with AIDS.)

So far, the company says the condom has been well received, but an outcry from more conservative Indians has spewed forth, particularly in the state of Madhya Pradesh. Opponents argue it’s a banned sex toy masquerading as a condom. A particularly outspoken critic is that state’s minister for roads and energy, who, presumably, must want folks to focus on the use of cars for driving, rather than using the backseats.

The only thing I can think of is that he was concerned after reading my post on the ranking of the best cars to have sex in. Either that, or he’s afraid the vibrations could adversely impact the performance of India’s favorite car, the Ambassador, thereby damaging roads and leading to unnecessary energy usage? Hard to say, I’m just trying to make sense of it all.

Condom Truck Tips, Spills Load

I spent the summer of 2003 working in the Public Affairs Office of the US Embassy in Malawi. Pinned above my desk was a newspaper clipping, with a headline that read, “I am not a condom.” I read that clipping every day — and laughed about it every day.

The subject of the piece — a Member of Parliament — was explaining how indispensable he was to Government and how he could simply not be tossed aside, like a worthless rubber. Hence: “I am not a condom.” Arguably, his decision to compare himself to a prophylactic was not in his best interest — but it sure did give some reporter a headline that wrote itself.

Speaking of headlines that write themselves, check out this clipping, titled “Condom truck tips, spills load.” Opening with the line, “The rubber truly hit the road yesterday…” this is one travel story I’d love to have covered — if just for the easy jokes.

Condom truck

Easy jokes include:

  • Condoms can’t save truck driver from accident
  • Condoms fall off driver’s big rig
  • Spilled condoms make for messy clean up

Got a better one?