SkyMall Monday: Sling Couture Fashion Face Mask ACTUAL REVIEW

Travel is a grimy, germ-filled activity that tests the limits of our tolerance for all things bacterial. Recycled plane air, cramped buses and less-than-hygienic hotel rooms all conspire to infect us. Staying healthy on the road is essential if you want to enjoy your holiday or get the job done on a business trip. However, you also want to look good when you’re traveling so that you can woo a sexy local or dress the part of a savvy business traveler. How do you keep germs at bay while also looking like the dapper gadabout that you are? Rather than compromise form for function, you deserve to look your best while continuing to feel your best. No one knows that better than the mad scientists at SkyMail. That’s why they provide you with a way to deter bacteria while inviting attention. It’s time to get sassy while staying healthy with the Sling Couture Fashion Face Mask.

I traveled with the Sling Couture Fashion Face Mask from the subways of New York City to the wide open spaces of Yellowstone National Park to a hot air balloon in Turkey’s Cappidocia region. Did it keep me healthy and appropriately dressed?


If you’re an avid SkyMall Monday reader, you’re already familiar with Sling Couture. We reviewed their signature arm sling earlier this year. It kept us looking sophisticated while convalescing. But preventing infections and diseases is a much tougher task. I was skeptical that a flashy mask could help me avoid picking up a bug while on the road, so I put it through a series of rigorous tests.

Available in 12 styles, there’s a Sling Couture Fashion Face Mask to suit every person and mood. I tested Red Glitter, which brought out my eyes.

I headed underground to the New York City subway armed with my Sling Couture Fashion Face Mask and stood prominently in the middle of a train car. New York City subway trains are far from sanitary. Along with muffled announcements and loud music escaping from headphones, coughing is a ubiquitous sound on the subway. No matter how many people wheezed, coughed or sneezed, I stood clear of the closing doors in my shiny mask and stood out as a fashion icon in a city known for style.

From there, I took the skies and flew west to Jackson, WY. Planes are Petri dishes of bacteria. The air is stale, the space is cramped and you can feel every cough and sneeze on the back of your neck. However, I read the SkyMall catalog with no problem despite several passengers sounding as if they had typhoid. And I did so while not being one of those overly casual fliers wearing a tracksuit.

The toughest test of all soon followed as the Fashion Face Mask came with me to Turkey. The air in Istanbul is thick. Approximately 12 million people live in Turkey’s largest city and, despite its many cosmopolitan neighborhoods, it still struggles to fully modernize. As I crossed the Bospherus from Asia to Europe, I donned my mask. I stayed healthy while also looking as if I belonged in the European Capital of Culture.

If there is one downside to the Sling Couture Fashion Face Mask, it’s that the mask itself is not particularly breathable. But breathability is not a major concern when evaluating face masks. They are less like doctors masks and more similar to masks used by painters or construction workers. That said, they do a fantastic job at keeping asbestos at bay.

Travel is taxing, exhausting and, at times, sickening. Protect yourself and celebrate your style with the Sling Couture Fashion Face Mask. You’ll look good, feel good and only slightly confuse everyone around you.

Be sure to check out the gallery of photos from my travels with the Sling Couture Fashion Face Mask.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.

SkyMall Monday: FaceTrainer

Growing older means adjusting to change. Change in your interests, change in your appearance and change in your ability to digest dairy without eye-burning flatulence. While people may enjoy the first and torture their spouses with the third, it’s the second that causes people much consternation. People try to hide the affects of aging using everything from creams to salves to balms to ointments to lotions. But what everyone forgets is that only one thing can truly help you turn back the clock. No, I’m not talking about eating babies to absorb their youthful souls. That only helps with spider veins. In order to make your face look like it did when you were a teenager (minus the embarrassing acne and nose that was too big for your head), you need to turn to SkyMall. This week, SkyMall Monday is here to give us all that youthful appearance that we all long to recapture. Forget about all of those placenta treatments and bird poop facials. It’s time that you restored your face to its former glory by shoving it into the Face Trainer.FaceTrainer is made by the good people at no!no! Why would you name your company no!no!? Probably because you sell rape whistles. But no!no! sells skin care products. So, you know, we’re not going to focus on the name. We prefer to focus on results. And what’s better than facial muscle resistance training in an unobtrusive mask?

Would you rather grow old gracefully or pump your face full of botulism? You’re simply going to be a liver-spotted old hag with an inability to emote. But you don’t have to take my word for it. You never do so why start now? Take a look at the product description and your face will begin to tighten up immediately:

Get a natural looking lift and look years younger with FaceTrainer, the only fitness device that applies the proven principals of resistance training to facial muscles. With just 10 minutes a day in the privacy of your own home, you can tighten sagging skin and ease the signs of aging. Clear, easy to follow illustrated and video instructions take you step-by-step through the exercises for the ultimate workout.

By now, you’re surely itching to watch these aforementioned instructional videos. Well, I’m sure you have work to do right now, but if you really want to watch people do facial exercises while inside a bondage costume, then don’t let me stop you. Just click here and keep some tissues and lotion close by.

You can continue to trip over your jowls or you can strap on the FaceTrainer and experience a “71% reduction in sagging.” The remaining 29% of sagging will just allow you to keep food crumbs stashed in the folds of your skin for when you get hungry in the middle of a movie.

Don’t just sit around growing old and waiting to die. Run away from death’s cold, icy grip by continuing to look young and virile. Strap on the FaceTrainer and unleash your inner child.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.