Turkey Offers Moustache Transplant Surgery Vacation Packages

We’ve all heard of medical tourism in which travelers head abroad to get liposuction or a nose job and then recuperate on the beach – but have you ever heard of a mustache transplant vacation?

Cosmetic surgeons in Turkey have been performing hair transplants on balding men for years; however, it seems there’s now growing demand from men with bald upper lips.

Men from Asia, Europe and the Middle East have been flocking to the country in order to give their mediocre moustaches a helping hand and tourism agencies have taken notice. Many local companies have begun offering “transplant packages” in which tourists can get their surgery done before chilling out at a Mediterranean Resort or hitting the capital’s shopping malls.Turkey has quickly been making a name for itself in the health care tourism industry. Last year alone, the country earned $1 billion from travelers visiting to have surgical procedures done. Of course, most of that revenue likely comes from procedures like plastic surgery, but the facial hair transplants are certainly adding up, with one doctor in Istanbul claiming he performs around 60 mustache transplants a month.

Interestingly, there’s little interest from Turks in getting the procedure done. According to the Wall Street Journal, the number of Turkish men sporting moustaches has fallen radically in the past two decades – not that they have any trouble growing facial fuzz. “Personally, I’d be suspicious of a Turk who couldn’t grow a mustache,” a salesman from Istanbul told the newspaper. “But if foreigners need to come anywhere for the operation, it should be here. The Turkish mustache is still the envy of the world.”

[Photo credit: Flickr user hapal]

SkyMall Monday: Beard Cap

I’ve been a bit cranky in this space recently. I’ve railed against the Nuddle Blanket and the Ponchillow in the last few weeks. Many of you, I’m sure, have begun to worry that I’ve lost my zest for SkyMall. Rest assured that I remain optimistic about our favorite in-flight catalog and that there are still countless products that leave me engorged with excitement. In fact, SkyMall Monday headquarters is abuzz over this week’s featured invention. As you might know, I typically sport a beard. I’m a bit of a follicle aficionado and, as such, appreciate all things whisker-related. I understand, however, that not everyone can grow out their facial hair. Women, pre-pubescent boys and many Asians lack the ability to cultivate a thick, luxurious face garden. Thankfully, there is now an alternative. As winter clutches us in her icy grip, stay warm and sport the chin mane of your dreams with the Beard Cap.Beards are sacred and personal things. In a perfect world, we would also have flowing locks dangling from our faces. Sadly, that is not nature’s way. Beards can be fickle and there are those who conspire to remove them through nefarious means. The Beard Cap allows you to sport a beard when needed and hide it when danger presents itself.

Think that a cap with a beard is a waste of fabric? Believe that there are better ways to protect your face from the cold? Well, while you figure out how to put on a balaclava, we’ll be reading the product description:

Gray and black cap has attached mustache and beard.

1 size fits most adults.

It is what is says it is. Isn’t that the mark of any good beard – real or otherwise? Beards lack pretense. They’re the working man’s facial hair. They’re not for everyone (one size fits “most” but not all) but everyone is for them. Think about it.

Don’t let your lack of testosterone or ethnic makeup keep you from sporting the beard that you so richly deserve. Ignore the aspersions cast by those who would rather see you “clean shaven.” There is nothing dirty about beards (except for when you cupcakes and chili dogs) and you have every right to grow or buy your own. Even if the one you buy makes you look like an atomic ginger.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.

SkyMall Monday: Mustache Mirror

I’m no stranger to facial hair. And I’m certainly a supporter of mustaches. However, I understand that there are many people who can’t grow lip sweaters. Whether it’s due to genetics, illness, workplace rules or simply gender, some poor souls must remain fresh-faced. Until Locks for Love allows me to donate my beard to someone (all joking aside, that’s a great charity that I urge you to check out), those without blooming facial follicles will be forced to find alternative means for covering their lips. While using a permanent marker to draw a stache may seem like a good idea, that can get out of hand. Fake mustaches tend to fall off at inopportune times and masks are just plain creepy. Thankfully, SkyMall is prepared to address this serious issue. Now, when guests come over to SkyMall Monday headquarters, they too can have a mustache thanks to the new Mustache Mirror.Mustaches show that you are a virile man (or woman, if you’re Sicilian). They display your power, confidence and potency. These are traits that must be broadcast to the world. For some, however, mustaches are as elusive as unicorns, leprechauns and the McRib. That doesn’t mean that they should be denied the joy one experiences when they first see themselves with a swath of hair darting across their upper lip like a steamship proudly crossing the Atlantic.

Think that mustaches are only for pedophiles and dictators? Believe that mustaches should have died in the 80s? Your prejudice only makes me more determined to share the product description with you:

Ever wonder how you’d look styled with a ‘stache? Worry not about facial hair farming inhibitions, thanks to our exclusive beveled-edge mirror.

Three bushy, manly lip ticklers are printed boldly at the perfect level so you can try one on for size; the ready-to-hang accent will be a hit in your entry or powder room.

Worry not, indeed! Plus, we’re bringing back the term “powder room.” That’s a bonus.

While I would prefer to see more than three mustaches on the mirror and wish that handlebar varieties made up less than 66.6% of the options, I still feel that the Mustache Mirror is a major breakthrough in facial hair research.

For all of you without mustaches, this is your rebirth. You have a second chance to live the life you always felt you were supposed to live. Remember, mustaches are not a choice. They’re a way of life.

For more information on mustaches, I urge you to visit the American Mustache Institute.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.