Coast Guard rescues unwitting drunk man one mile offshore, drifting on pool floatie


You heard right: The United States Coast Guard yesterday rescued a Florida man who got drunk, climbed into an inflatable swimming pool ring (the kind little kids use), passed out, and then drifted a mile offshore from Belleair Beach on the Gulf of Mexico. Fortunately, a concerned boater spotted what he thought was debris and came for a closer look, then called the Coast Guard to report what he thought was a dead body. Despite boat horns and loud shouting, the intoxicated man did not respond. Jerry Whipple, age 48, was both dazed and confused as the Coast Guard rescued him and transported him back to the nearest hospital for a closer look.

Mr. Whipple was later released, although he might still be charged with operating a seafaring craft while under the influence. That’s one small step for the Coast Guard . . . and one mile-wide leap for Florida.

Woman sues Hyatt after dancing wedding guest breaks her arm

Weddings are a time of celebration. People like to have a few drinks, maybe hit the dance floor. But there always seems to be one guest who takes things too far – who drinks a little too much and gets a little too wild. At a wedding at a New Jersey Hyatt in 2008, that guest not only got a bit too drunk, he allegedly got so forceful on the dance floor that he broke another guest’s arm. And now Hyatt could be held responsible.

According to the New York Post, Christine Mancision was getting her groove on when James Graeber grabbed her, and flung her so violently across the dance floor that she fell down and hurt her arm. She went to the hospital, where she found out her wrist was broken and she needed surgery. She’s now suing the Hyatt for over-serving Graeber, who she claims was visibly intoxicated.

The suit is for $1 million and claims Hyatt violated New Jersey’s “dram shop” laws by serving someone who was obviously drunk. Mancision’s lawyer said the Hyatt “owes an obligation to its guests . . to not fuel the fire of intoxication by pouring alcohol down the throat of an intoxicated person.” Really, a Hyatt staff member poured alcohol down the throat of Graeber?

Getting manhandled by some drunk buffoon at a wedding is not fun (though probably not all that uncommon). But how can the court say that wouldn’t have happened had the Hyatt not given the guy another drink? And how can they prove he was “visibly intoxicated”? Everyone does the chicken dance at weddings. That proves nothings. Will the wedding video be called in as evidence?

If it’s true, what happened to Mancision was unfortunate. But it seems like her “assailant” should be the one who pays for her hospital bills, not the hotel.

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[via Vagabondish]

2/3 of Brit pubs to increase beer prices

Nearly a fifth of British pub owners are increasing beer prices now, taking the national average above the current level of ₤3 a pint. Ten percent are looking to pop an extra 15 pence on every glass, with two-thirds looking to push prices higher by 5 pence to 10 pence. The price of a beer has tripled over the past 20 years, obviously making it a better investment than that Enron stock you’re hoping will bounce back.

A new 2 percent tax is contributing to the elevated cost of intoxication, though operational expenses (like updating menus and cash registers) are leading to the extra imposition.

Seven percent of pubs will absorb the extra costs until September. Ninety-seven percent don’t give a shit about your need to imbibe at a value.

Pilot hits house, crashes plane then gets up and drives back home

Here is a wacky story from the aviation world; a pilot was flying his Cessna towards an air strip at the private Brookeridge Airport near Chicago, when something went wrong.

During his approach, he clipped a house, crashed into some trees and flipped his plane upon impact.

Luck was clearly temporarily on his side, because he was able to walk away, get into a car and drive back home.

When the police visited him at his residence, he was charged with operating a plane while under the influence of drugs or alcohol. After a brief visit to the hospital, the local Sheriff placed him under arrest and he is currently being held on a $100,000 bond.

Of course, it will be interesting to see how the police plan to prove he was drunk when he crashed as I’m sure it is not impossible that he had a stiff drunk to relax after being in a nasty plane crash!