SkyMall Monday: Portable Microwave

When I’m toiling away in the SkyMall Monday headquarters, I tend to cook a lot. From burritos to tacos to quesadillas, I enjoy preparing a wide array of ethnic foods. But when I travel, I often crave those tastes of home. Unfortunately, cooking on the road can pose a real challenge. At home I have all of my gadgets, like a freezer to hold my Hot Pockets and microwave to heat up said pockets to the appropriate hotness. Surely I cannot travel with a microwave. It’s not like I own a spaceship or K.I.T.T. The last thing I want to do when I travel is rely solely on roadside eateries, because, as you can tell from my cooking expertise, I treat my body like a temple. So, how can I whip up my favorite meals when I’m away from home? This sounds like a job for SkyMall! And, of course, our favorite catalog has the solution. My fellow connoisseurs of rapidly cooked cuisine, I present to you the Portable Microwave Oven!
Finally, I can enjoy chewy pizza, faux-buttered popcorn and off-colored vegetables in my boat, motel room, or even in my car! Now, normally I do my best to convince you how awesome these products are, but the Portable Microwave’s product description is so amazing, that I we’re going to get right to it.

Take it away, SkyMall:

The microwave plugs into a wall outlet, a car or boat’s DC outlet, or connects to a car battery (jumper cables provided), allowing you to make popcorn or reheat food at campsites, tailgate parties, or during boating excursions.

Jumper cables included? What could possibly go wrong by rigging a radiation device to jumper cables?

The 10″ wide by 7″ deep interior easily accommodates a salad plate or soup bowl, and the microwave has three preset buttons (pizza, coffee, and popcorn) or you can enter the cooking time in minutes and seconds.

Mmmm, microwaved coffee just like Juan Valdez used to make. And I am so thrilled that it accommodates salad bowls, as I love nothing more than some hot, wilted lettuce after a long day on the road. Hot salad is what got the first pioneers across the American West. Well, that and some cannibalism.

Campfires are for suckers and grills are so last century. I need my food now and I need it smoldering on the inside while cold on the outside.

So, if you like scalding your mouth (and nuking your testicles) while doing 75mph down Route 66, then stop using your hot pot in your El Camino and step up to the Portable Microwave Oven.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.