Video: Happy Halloween From The Department Of Homeland Security

So it’s Saturday night, and I’m sitting here surfing the interweb looking for a scary, travel-themed video to post. You know, because it’s almost Halloween (and my social life is a bit lacking, apparently). Here’s what popped up on Google, courtesy of the Department of Homeland Security. It certainly scared the crap out of me.

The best airline safety announcement videos

Air travelers have all been there — the plane is about to take off, but first we have to awkwardly look away or bury our noses in magazines to avoid paying attention to the safety announcements. They’re the same every time, so we always know that the closest exit may be behind us. But a few savvy airlines have come up with better ways to grab passengers’ attention. From stripping down to rapping, here are some of the best airline safety announcements you’ll see on board.

Thomson Airways
British airline Thomson Airways knows that cuteness always gets attention. When a plane full of adorable kids tells you how to buckle your seatbelt, you’re sure to listen:

Air New Zealand
If cute doesn’t work, sex always sells. Take this Air New Zealand video, which encourages passengers to “take a second look” at safety — and the body-painted flight crew:

To further prove they have a sense of humor, Air New Zealand released a blooper reel of the clips that didn’t make the safety video. After all, reciting lines wearing body paint can’t be too easy:

Delta Airlines
Delta is a little more subtle with its sexy announcements — but every person in the video is ridiculously attractive, with perfect teeth and not a hair out of place. YouTube commenters have even dubbed the main announcer “Deltalina” for her resemblance to Angelina Jolie:

Virgin America
International airlines aren’t the only ones who get to have fun. Take Virgin America’s safety video, which pokes fun at the various characters found on a typical flight:

Southwest Airlines
Southwest is known for its funny flight crews. This flight attendant brings the entertainment with a safety rap:

This Southwest attendant makes announcements American Idol-style, singing a parody of Beyonce’s “Single Ladies:”

Virgin Atlantic
When in doubt, use flashy graphics. Virgin Atlantic puts passengers at ease with its calming music and intriguing animation:

Hilarious abuse of the Delta In-Flight Safety Video

So, here’s the Delta Airlines In-Flight Safety Video. Pretty standard, right? Nothing to write home about. A good-looking, vaguely-Southern flight attendant, some poor, dorky guy whose big break was wearing a life vest — all good fun.

Well, someone took that fun a step further …
Did you think that that “smoking is not allowed” moment was a little over-the-top? Somebody did! Enjoy this hilarious slowdown, and re-slowdown.

I can’t believe someone took the time to do this, but dang, it’s funny.

Flight attendant gives hilarious safety message

Happy Monday and this should perk you up. If you’ve ever spaced out during the flight attendant safety talks and casually wondered if perhaps you should actually look at the card in the seat pocket in front of you, here’s a video that will remind you exactly how many exit doors there are–and everything else you need to know in case of an emergency. All the information is accurate, it’s the delivery that gets your attention. Here’s a sample.

“If you don’t like our service, the flight gets too long, we have 6 emergency exits–2 at the front, 2 over window doors, and 2 at the rear–signs over head–lights on the floor– leave through those exits.”

The life vest, the seat becoming a floatation device, the oxygen mask and that seat pocket instruction are all covered. Thanks, Marilyn Terrell, our friend at Intelligent Traveler, for sending this hilarious gem our way. And thanks to rodizzl for recording the attendant and posting it on You Tube. Stellar.