Palin in China

by Neil Woodburn on

One can never go wrong reading Michael Palin.

The former Monty Python member has jumped headfirst into the travel writing business and has produced some real gems over the years.

It was therefore with great pleasure that I came across an article he recently penned for The Times (UK) in which he accompanies a professional photographer on a trip to China.

China is a strange and bizarre place even without Palin’s wit and humor. Toss in some of the comedian’s pithy observations and an entertaining writing style and you’ve got a great read indeed.

I won’t ruin the article by giving away too much, but I will quote a fun little passage typical of Palin’s humorous style to whet your appetite.

Even the farms here look sinister, an impression confirmed when we try to visit one of them, only to be told that it had recently been closed because of an outbreak of “Disease Number Five”.

Just Fake It!

by Iva Skoch on

Many folks, these days, are traveling for more than just sightseeing, they’re going shopping. With the dollar lingering near all-time lows versus some major world currencies, many shopping tourists are traveling to the States. However, some real shopping bargains exist elsewhere, particularly in the rip-off goods category.

My trip last year to China was a real eye-opener: the major markets all sold knock-off goods openly, while big, red banners, hang across all entrances, proclaiming “Maintain Intellectual Property” (one of the few signs anywhere in China written in English). (I’m still trying to figure out what the banners that said “Striking Forbid Illegal Management Activities of Soliciting Goods” mean, but that’s another story …)

These huge open-air markets are enough to make brand-name companies fume, with brands like North Face, Nike, Victorinox, and Columbia Sportswear and others all featured prominently, for pennies on the dollar. They don’t even bother with the spelling errors (you’ve seen them: “Addidas”) or mismatched teams (e.g., “Atlanta Braves Football Club”). The rip-offs are so realistic, it’s hard to tell them from the real thing, and it’s all right there in the open. It puts Canal Street to shame for sheer audacity.

But it’s not just China that’s in the big business of selling black-market items. They’re being sold across Europe too, usually in Asian-run boutiques. The shoe pictured above was featured prominently in the window of a downtown Barcelona shoe store just last month. Note the altered swoosh. I can hear Phil Knight screaming …

Building or Chinese Menu Item?

by Iva Skoch on

Seeing pictures of the proposed new biomedical research center in Chengdu, China (Szechuan province) reminded me of some menu items I tried in that city last year. One reporter called the proposed building “the blob.”

The Szechuan province, of course, is home to that terrific spicy food that is ubiquitous in Chinese restaurants everywhere, usually on the menu right next to an asterisk or a nearby ‘chili pepper’ icon, signifying “this food is hot as hell.”

The traditional and most popular way of eating food in Chengdu is the hotpot. Basically, you’re given a large bowl of boiling, flavored oil that sits atop your table, while you cook skewers of various foods in the oil–kind of like fondue without the cheese. Most of the time, you have some rough idea of what it is you’re cooking, since you picked it off the shelf yourself. The best oil, we were told, was as old as possible: as oil burned off and was eaten, the bowl was topped up; if you cleaned the bowl and used fresh oil, you killed the taste. The older the oil, the better. The table has a hole in it and sits above an industrial-sized propane tank and burner, one to each table. With the cooking-oil-slick floors and open flames everywhere, it’s an American trial-lawyer’s dream.

Back to the building: the building, it seems, was meant to look like a cell, peppered with meeting room pods which were meant to look like embedded proteins around the outside. And the shape? You can see for yourself. Care for a dip in the interior’s “mitochondrial” pools?

Yep, looks and sounds like something I’d be dunking in a bath of ancient, bubbling oil, filled with chili oil and fish heads.

Terracotta Posing

by Neil Woodburn on

Have you ever wanted to jump over that little rope that separates you from some ancient piece of history and become part of it yourself? To wander amongst ancient ruins, sit in a famous person’s chair in a house museum, or run your hands across old dinosaur bones?

The urge to do so was so overwhelming for Pablo Wendel that he put together a rather brilliant little plan. The German student, who was studying art in China, created a fake military uniform worn by the famous Terracotta Warriors in Xian. He then visited the archeological site and when no one was looking, jumped into the excavated pit, and assumed his place amongst the many lines of warriors.

Wendel stood frozen in place and managed to blend in for only a few minutes before alert authorities noticed one of the 2000 ancient statues was actually breathing and hauled him out of there. Apparently the dedicated performance artist kept his pose the entire time and police had to carry him out like a log.

City of Contrasts. Bite Me.

by Iva Skoch on

If I read one more time that a place X is a “place of contrasts” I am going to scream or start sending letters, depending on which side of the contrast spectrum I will find myself. Beijing has been called a “city of contrasts” by CNN, Los Angeles by PBS, St. Petersburg by The Mercury Sun, Genoa by The New York Times (Et tu, Brute?) The list goes on.

In fact, when you type in “city of contrasts” into Google, you get 113,000 hits. You get hundreds of pictures when you type in the same in Google Images. The funny thing is, most of those pictures show no contrast at all, even if the most trivial kind. Take the picture displayed. The description says: Kazan, Russia: City of Contrasts. And, where would the contrast be? The ugly houses versus the less ugly houses?

What I want to know: Is there a place on Earth that’s NOT a place of contrasts? Contrasts are everywhere – the poor and the rich, the new and the old, the beautiful and the ugly. Contrast is a given. Even my kitchen is a place of contrasts, if you examine the unwashed dishes next to the hand-cut crystal glasses.

As places start looking more gentrified and similar, travel writers will really need to get more creative. That is one good thing globalization could accomplish.