SkyMall Monday: Microwave cookware makes nuking easy

by Mike Barish on

Many people are intimidated by cooking. They worry that it’s too difficult – or that they are too inept – to produce an edible meal. “The only thing I know how to make is cereal,” people will say. Well, as much as bowls of Cap’n Crunch helped me get through my freshman year of college, you cannot live on cereal alone. However, if you truly are that bad of a cook (or, if your overprotective mother doesn’t let you use the stove), there is a trick for making simple and delicious meals all by yourself: the microwave. Sure, your microwave is great for making popcorn or turning a roll of foil into a light show, but, it can also be the only appliance you need to feed yourself if you don’t even know how to boil water. So, this week, SkyMall Monday takes a look at some of the best – and most useful – microwave cookware that SkyMall has to offer.Microwave S’mores Maker

Pictured above, the Microwave S’mores Maker allows you to make those delicious treats even when you’re not out in the woods on a camping trip. Why waste your time looking for the perfect s’mores stick when you can heat up your marshmallows from the inside so that they are hotter than the most intense lava flow? Is it possible to insure the roof of your mouth like JLo did to her butt?

Microwave Pasta Boat

If you seriously can’t boil water, then the Microwave Pasta Boat is for you. Don’t believe me? Well, take a look at the product description:

Cooking pasta can be a hassle. The amazing Pasta Boat makes it faster and easier to make perfect pasta every time right in your microwave oven. It’s soooo easy! Just put in the pasta, add water to the serving line, then pop it in the microwave. It’s that easy. Pasta boat keeps water at the perfect temperature – it actually does a better job than a pot on a stove!

So, wait, is it easy? I hope so, because cooking pasta on the stove is harder than training a dog to solve a Rubik’s Cube.

Microwave Egg Scrambler

Scrambled eggs are a fantastic breakfast. Making them, however, can be a real hassle. Who has time for all of that clean up? Thankfully, the Microwave Egg Scrambler puts the entire process in one dish. Don’t just take my word for it. Read the product description of this magical device:

Make it easy to make breakfast. This hand-dipped stoneware piece lets you scramble, cook and eat your morning eggs out of one dish-just whip up eggs (and cheese?) with the included wood-handle whisk, microwave for under three minutes, and you’re ready to go.

This thing is so mind-blowing that even the designers of the product aren’t sure of how much it can do! Can you add cheese to it? Who knows? You might also know the Microwave Egg Scrambler by its original name: a bowl.

There’s no more need for you to be on a first name basis with your Chinese food delivery man. Put down the phone and put on your lead bib because, from now on, you’re eating fresh, nuked meals. It’s about time you felt proud of yourself.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.

SkyMall Monday: Reel Marshmallow Roaster

by Mike Barish on

Despite the fact that spring is off to a chilly start here in the Northeast, we’ve begun to plan some camping trips for the upcoming summer. If you want to book the best campsites, you have to reserve early. As such, we’ve started taking a look at our camping gear over here at SkyMall Monday headquarters to make sure that everything survived the winter. On any camping trip, you want to have the proper gear and ensure that it’s all in working order. That way, once you’re at the site, you can just enjoy the great outdoors, relax and savor those sweet, sweet s’mores. However, s’mores-making technology hasn’t advanced much since people learned how to search for sticks in the woods. We’re still poking marshmallows onto dirty twigs and rotating our arms in ways that put tremendous stress on our wrists and elbows. Most people assume that our proximity to the fire is the most dangerous part of making s’mores, but it’s actually the physical labor. Thankfully, we can save ourselves a trip to the orthopedist thanks to SkyMall. The next time we go camping, we can roast our marshmallows with the Reel Marshmallow Roaster.I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t like s’mores. The combination of gooey marshmallow, melty chocolate and crispy graham crackers makes them the perfect camping snack. Plus, lighting marshmallows on fire is just plain ol’ fun. However, there’s nothing in the world more tedious than rotating your marshmallow (not a euphemism) to get it roasted evenly. After a night of binging on s’mores, you may find your wrist sore, swollen and tender. It’s a condition commonly referred to as Roasting Wrist. Most doctors treat Roasting Wrist with months of physical therapy, pain killers and the Hershey’s S’mores candy bar. It’s a long and arduous road filled with disappointment every time you taste that underwhelming confection. Thankfully, we can now avoid that with advances in modern s’more technology.

Think that sticks are the perfect s’mores tool. Believe that operating a fork attached to a fishing reel actually puts more stress on the human wrist than previous s’mores-making devices? Well, while you suffer through a charred marshmallow, we’ll be reading the product description:

Give it a spin, and you’ll never go back to a plain old stick again. Simply put your hot dog or marshmallow on the tip of this fishing reelpowered roaster, and crank it until it’s perfectly cooked on all sides.

Look, anything that gives you the excuse to say “crank it until it’s perfectly cooked” is a good thing. Am I right, ladies?

It’s not wishful thinking to suggest that Memorial Day will be here before you know it. With that comes camping trips, long hikes and, yes, s’mores. Get your gear in order and pick up some new gadgets to make your camping trips perfect.

See you by the campfire.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.

SkyMall Monday: Inflatable Turkey

by Mike Barish on

Few, if any, SkyMall products leave us speechless. Sure, there was the one product that I disliked, but I had plenty to say about that. In fact, I usually can’t say enough about SkyMall gear. This week’s SkyMall Monday, however, was a challenge to write. I stared the product for hours while pondering how to describe it. It’s clearly ripe for the SkyMall Monday treatment, yet it truly defies explanation. This is not to say that I entered into any sort of existential crisis. I haven’t been left to question the meaning of this product’s – or my own – existence. Rather, I’ve been left with an inability to explain how I can have such an affinity for something while simultaneously having no idea why. It’s kind of like how we all felt about Charlie Sheen when he first started acting crazy but before it all became sad. So, forgive me if my thoughts sound scattered, but I’m thoroughly enamored with – and completely baffled by – the Inflatable Turkey.It should be noted that Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday of the year. Perhaps that’s why the Inflatable Turkey has engendered such good will over here at SkyMall Monday headquarters. The idea of placing an inflatable turkey on an immaculately set table does, indeed, make me giggle. However, my pulse rises and I break into a cold sweat when I envision a carving knife getting too close to the puffed up poultry. Perhaps no SkyMall product has played with my emotions quite like the Inflatable Turkey.

Think that inflatable animals are a perversion? Believe that all meat served should be real and succulent? Well, why you make some gravy we’re going to gobble up the product description:

Create a centerpiece for a vegetarian feast. Use it as a placeholder on the platter as you visualize the Best Thanksgiving Ever. Then deflate for next year. Made of completely inedible vinyl; sized a realistic 16″L; photorealistic down to the bronzed tips of its wings.

I can’t think of a less offensive centerpiece for a vegetarian meal than a replica of a cooked animal. It will be nice to not have to use those photos of slaughterhouses to decorate the table at my next vegetarian pot luck. Sadly, this vinyl is inedible but at least the photorealism will have you laughing at your young nephew when he starts gnawing on the fake bird. Won’t that be a riot?

I wish I could better express my feelings for the Inflatable Turkey but I simply don’t understand them well enough. Hopefully, Lady Gaga will record a song that empowers me to embrace these emotions and articulate them more eloquently. Until then, I’ll just feel a tingle in my giblets that you may never comprehend.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.

SkyMall Monday: Parks and Recreation

by Mike Barish on

This week’s SkyMall Monday takes a look at last week’s episode of the NBC show Parks and Recreation. In the episode, the staff of the Pawnee, Indiana Parks and Recreation Department goes on a team building camping trip. One member of the team, Tom Haverford (played by Aziz Ansari), brags that he purchased all of his gear from the SkyMall catalog. Well, we took a keen interest in all of that gear here at SkyMall Monday headquarters. Can you really buy all of those products from our favorite online catalog? Watch the video to see just how accurate his collection of gear actually is.

You can also watch the entire episode of Parks and Recreation.

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.

SkyMall Monday: Packable Wine Glasses

by Mike Barish on

Drinking while you’re traveling can be tricky. Open container laws, TSA regulations and the challenge of packing wine bottles (despite advances in bottle protection technology) conspire to make enjoying your favorite wines away from home harder than it needs to be. It shouldn’t be this way. Wine is good for us. Just like we pack our medications and vitamins, we should be able to take our wine wherever we go. It’s just a matter of our health. Even if you do acquire wine in a liquor store while traveling, how will you drink it? Wine glasses are nearly impossible to pack. Drinking wine straight from the bottle is simply too conspicuous and far too tacky to be a reasonable option. Wine is best savored when sipped from a proper glass to allow it to breath. This is something that SkyMall Monday knows firsthand. Imbibing it any other way is to behave like a heathen. Travelers are nothing if not classy and sophisticated. So, if they have wine, they need wine glasses. Packing these vessels is even more difficult than packing bottles. Between the stems and the thin glass, they’re practically guaranteed to shatter in your luggage. Thankfully, SkyMall is here to help us drink on the road (but not drink and drive – that’s not acceptable). Now you can have your wine and drink it too – no matter where you are – with Packable Wine Glasses.Now, we can drink wine on the beach, at the theater or while touring ancient ruins like dignified sophisticates. Unlike the heathens drinking beer out of koozies, we can flaunt our pinkies in the air as we savor our wines in proper glasses while sitting on the toilet in the airport bathroom. It’s enough to make me start wearing my monocle again.

Think that wine can be poured into any kind of glass or cup? Believe that only someone with an overly aggressive affinity for wine would need portable glasses? Well, while you’re pairing your entree with an energy drink, we’ll be reading the product description:

Life’s too short to drink fine wine from paper cups. With our packable wine glasses, you don’t have to! Made of virtually indestructible BPA-free plastic, the stem unscrews from the bowl, and both stash in a handy travel pouch for easy packing.

A life spent using paper cups is a life wasted. Finally, a product that puts things in the proper perspective.

The next time you’re setting off on an adventure, be sure to do so in the classiest way possible. Before boarding the plane, don your finest sweatpants, carry on your largest luggage and be sure to bring your Packable Wine Glasses. Then be sure to tell everyone that you’re classy. If you don’t tell them, how will they know?

Check out all of the previous SkyMall Monday posts HERE.